I would like to talk about my Mom for a minute. She passed away 10 years ago at age 84 after 6 years of declining health, and a lifetime of serious illnesses and diseases - lung, heart, eye, rheumatoid arthritis... - and 13 years as a widow.
She explained to me that as her life changed, and her health declined, that she viewed her life in chapters, closed each chapter in its time and moved on. Some chapters: raised a big family, retired and travelled with my Dad, danced and danced, spent winters in Texas for 25 years - 3 couples, 2 1/2 couples, 3 sisters and one brother-in-law, 2 sisters. Giving up her car, using a walker, then a scooter to get around, moving from big family home, to smaller house, to mobile home, to independent apartment, to assisted living, to hospice...

She explained to me that each old chapter was sad to close, each new chapter was scary to open, but also offered something new. Our adventures got smaller with each chapter - from climbing a mountain to see the Monarchs and whitewater rafting with grandkids, to visiting her childhood home in Iowa, to going to an old favorite restaurant for lunch or dinner, to learning to watercolor and having her painting in an exhibition, to having take-out Chinese with a grandchild.

I have often thought about her "chapters" as my life and health take unexpected turns. I pray I will find the grace and strength to accept and embrace the new chapters in my life as I age. Perhaps this is an exercise to try instead of focusing on losses?

Sue

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