Hello. Although I didnt have same surgery as you nor chemo I did have radiation internal and external in 1985 for cancer of cervix stage 2 and eventually started my journey of late stage radiation damage to pelvis.... radiation damage to bladder etc. and the dreaded awful diarrhea... its been around 20 years and then C.Diff 2018 and fecal incontinence since... unless someone goes through this unpredictable, yes embarrassing, smelly, messy, PAINFUL, almost daily issue its hard for them to understand how life-altering it is.
Yes, you are so right that its a bit of a relief to be able to come on this site and discuss this and often others will offer some of their ways to cope. I am now 77 and only thing that helps is Imodium..sometimes, and my diet is plain and I could go on .
But this is about you: I hope that your body heals more as time goes by, even to the point of hopefully going back to work (I hope you have alternate income on which to live in the meantime as $$ stress doesn't help on top of it) and that one day there will not only be a "cure" for cancer but treatments that, unfortunately, keep us alive but so affect our quality of life. Take care. (p.s. I always keep with me a bag with toiletries in it no matter where I go so at least when have accident can clean up and keep going - although travel is now out of the question). J.