I am so sorry for your situation with your children. My only child lives with his wife about 7 hours away from me. His in-laws live nearby, so they spend all holidays with them. I go to visit when I'm able, but I've had several health issues that make travel difficult. My grandchidren barely know me. I hate holidays. Everyone I know is happy about being with out-of-town family. I just pray for January 2 to come quickly while I stay home and cry most days.