@novak120 It is just about 7 years ago that I was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer. After my Whipple, I had 6 months of chemo (gemcitabine also known as gemzar). Because of a very rare reaction to the chemo, I lost most of my kidney function. After 5 years of scans that showed no evidence of cancer, I was able to get on the kidney transplant list at 2 transplant centers. Just over a year ago, we moved and I had to find a new oncologist. He wanted his own PET scan. That scan found that my cancer had returned. I was immediately taken off both transplant lists. I, too, have very limited options for treatment. Typical treatment is radiation and chemo. Doctors were concerned that chemo would further damage my kidneys so I did 25 rounds of radiation a year ago. Since that time, I have been going to Mayo every 3 months for a PET/MRI. So far, these scans have shown that my cancer is not growing or spreading. Because the cancer is not growing, there has been no treatment. If the cancer begins to grow I will need to start chemo. Because of lack of kidney function, I will have to have dialysis after every chemo treatment. It has to be really hard to be going through cancer again for the 4th time. I fully understand the struggles you have with depression and anxiety. For me, I thank God for and enjoy every day of life that he gives me. Take it one day at a time and never ever give up.