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What to Expect as a Transplant Caregiver May 31 10:34pm | By Kristin Eggebraaten (@keggebraaten)Comment receiving replies
The more I learn the more I realize that he really needs someone that lives in his area or near it. He's in Southern Mississippi and I'm in NYC (Manhattan). The people he knows are married and have families so I can't see them being the answer. He's got a spare bedroom so I'm thinking that perhaps a retired aide who would trade free board for being his caregiver? But then again, he really might not like the idea of having a stranger be with him in his home for weeks or months on end. It's a dilemma that he's going to have to address soon. I feel badly that I can't help any more than finding this Forum and picking up knowledge that I can pass along to him. I even sent him the link to this forum in hopes that he'd join. He's got VERY LITTLE patience and the slightest difficulty will cause him tremendous frustration. That's another issue that will probably increase should he have a transplant.
Again, thank you for your candor and information Ginger.
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@actsoflight I temper what my next words are, with sympathy for you in the situation you find yourself in, and your friend in his situation. He needs to also be his own advocate. Have him talk to the social worker at the transplant center, and lay out his situation in clear language. It is commendable for you to ask all the questions while searching for answers before jumping in to this, and I am really impressed! There are many "what ifs" right now, aren't there, that you both would like to see concrete answers to, when there may not be anything solid to hold on to.
Before my husband and I married in 2018, I was alone for many years, and had to rely on the good graces of friends if I needed any help. I lived alone and handled almost everything on my own. It was a great sense of "feeling beholden" to someone if they gave me a ride to an appointment, or assisted me somehow. I hated that feeling. If there will be an aide or caregiver with him, he must, by necessity, "get over it", to be successful.
My sincere apologies if this sounds harsh; it's really not meant to be. Your friend is very lucky to have someone who cares enough like you do, to look at all the angles in advance.
Ginger