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Lacy (@lacy2)

Demoralization or Depresssion ?

Depression & Anxiety | Last Active: Feb 24, 2021 | Replies (19)

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Oh hope you didn't think I was comparing … but I suppose am trying to say, or wonder if, for instance actual life events does make a difference in how some of us cope: my husband is a very basic person, my second marriage, and he was raised differently, did not suffer 9 yrs abusive marriage with no family support, leave his home and country at 18, did his own thing with no children etc. and I could go on….. whereas I have a laundry list of illnesses and mentally abusive (daily) 9 year marriage and then raising 2 children on my own office income…. it was a hard and a lot of stress, then finally diagnozed with cancer and had major drug reaction etc. etc. – am not looking to say I win as I had much more stress and worries than he did BUT I DID. So in basic terms.. as I see it, he still has a lot more fight left in him than I do ! Sorry hard to explain… but he recently had emergency heart surgery out of town and came home a changed man…. I couldn't believe it… maybe first time in life faced with death? it was out of his control? pain and suffering? Trauma! I dont know and didnt mean this chat to turn into this…. but some people have higher hills to climb; some find it hard to climb lower hills than others; and some have fallen down the hills high or low so many times they just are struggling to overcome the bumps, let alone hills. In friendship, J.

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Replies to "Oh hope you didn't think I was comparing ... but I suppose am trying to say,..."

@lacy2 No, no, no, I don't think you were comparing at all. Because some of us undergo stressors earlier or more severe, we often find out where our strengths lie, or how our coping skills are tested. Others may not get that, or have to dig deep, until later on. It seems peaks and valleys are in relation to our unique experiences, would you agree?

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