@jesfactsmon ... gosh no worries about BC Hank .... had husband's medical problem happened years ago I would have been able to handle it ... just that not well myself it was a bit overwhelming.. and although I have always had concern for others going through situations like this, there is nothing like going through it ourselves eh? Thanks for the info about the meds.. over the years we havent agreed on everything but this was such a different personality change and for first few weeks I handled it well but then it got to me - hurtful, and then guilty because of my response. As I have read or been told: "we are only human" after all. Things are falling into place more now although I would honestly say I have not had a full, "happy," normal-for-me day for years and have resigned myself to this "new me." I isolated myself long before covid (too long to explain) and although still have my licence, decided not to drive any more as i feel I can drive but not "react" as quickly in an emergency. But I do miss the life I used to lead, dashing around the house tidying up , cooking, shopping, on the desktop keeping in touch with relatives and a few friends: now friends have passed away (here and UK) as well as family and of course with lockdowns etc. that put the icing on the cake. I so feel for those alone with no family around during this pandemic...and our winters are l-o-n-g, although so far not as much snow as usual. We are/were not travellers but did visit my children as adults then working in San Francisco 3 times and I loved it, couild have moved there in a second; then Floirda twice - loved that too; and twice 2 quick visits to LasVegas, but thats over period of 40 years. Ha, my husband came with me to visit my Mum in UK once and got so homesick he came back to Canada a week early... culture shock?.... her tiny house, the accents, money, food etc. We now laugh about it. Thank goodness I have photos of "pre-illness" days to show that there were good times... however the last three years have taken their toll, and reading of others' challenges on here (along with how some people have overcome them) ... well it is really appreciated that people share their stories, thank you.