Hello, Sue. I read your message and as I'm writing, I have a smile on my face, just took a really deep breath, shoulders went down a
'foot'!, neck and head still hurt but will probably hurt less as I go along. It 5 PM. I came downstairs an hour ago, put a Publix Aprons ready to heat chicken breast stufffed w/spinach and gouda cheese. I love these prepared meals from them. I can eat real, 'home-made' food w/o preservatives and soo many additives...all I do it stick it in it's pan in my new covection oven, set and wait. What a wonderful way to 'cook'. Either that or Publix deli stuff and/or frozen Healthy Choice or whatever...with no preservatives. I eat yogurt and fruit w/granola parfaits for breakfast, and have an Atkins smoothie. This is pretty much what I eat these days. The yogurt and smoothies help my tummy and relux. And, give me good calcium. I haven't had milk products other than that due to intolerance. The beginning of this horrid year, I set up a little special area for myself in my 'kitty' room, 3rd bedroom w/kitty litter. I have a small fridge for diet coke, bottled water, electrolyte water, Atkins smoothies, yogurt, white grape juice, iced tea I get from Publix in quart bottles I can lift....arthritis in hands, wrist, fingers, everywhere so i can't lift anything as heavy as a gallon of water. I've figured out lots of ways to accomplish what I need to do, but I do get so frustrated and angry that I can't do what I want, when and how I want. I moved fast and with real purpose all my life. What a change!!! BTW: I was in retirement administration for 15+ years, until I just couldn't deal with the emotional strains of 24/7 responsibility for so many lives of the older residents and their families. So, I left, had emergency abdominal surgery for a large benign tumor, opened a shop in a residential area, selling home decor, stationery, greeting cards, gifts of all sorts, collectibles and whatever else I thought fun. I loved it, had a ball and almost killed myself with the work. But, that's what I did....throughout my life....Well, you asked about the double vision. I was diagnosed with Myasthenia Gravis and that was considered the cause. It wasn't/isn't. I don't have it...after 8+ years of the diagnosis. Why the dilopia? Don't know. So far, no one has given me a reason. Since I had eyelid surgery at Mayo to tighten the lids so I can again open my eyes, all the way, I do see much better and the surgery was totally successful. I still have dilopia, but not as often. Before, it was always and then most of the time. Now, for the last year, it comes and goes on a whim. No idea what brings it on, unless it's related to being tired, or ill or mechanical in some way. Now, my sight is getting worse at times. Blurred, writing or sight just off kilter if that makes sense? Not quite double, but off....I can't see distance clearly any more, can't see street signs. I often can't read with my reading glasses, or read on the computer. Now, I see ok with reading glasses, but after a bit on the computer, it'll get blurred or unclear. Also, my dry eyes get really seriouly bad at times. That interferes with sight as well. I use Refresh as needed, Xiidra drops 2X daily. They help some. So, since the eyes are worsening, I'm seeing Mayo neuro opthomologist next week. This coming week I see cardiology for additional work-ups...bldwk, ekg, echo, meeting w/doc. I'm wearing a heart moniter for a month, since I was in Mayo hospital a couple weeks ago for thyroid mess and probably heart as well. Thyroid is better controlled now with less synthroid, I was over medicated.Amazing how many symptoms are now gone or controlled by just that adjustment! Then, the following week I see the neuro opthomologist. I do hope he'll find an answer of some kind. It'd be lovely to get some real relief from the dry eye as it affects my life much of the time. If he can determine the cause for dilopia, wouldn't that be lovely. I think 'coke bottle' glasses are used for that and help us focus better, see only one of anything. Oh, I do see 2 at all levels. Watching tv is fun! I have 2 screens, 2 of everything in blocks, almost side by side. That's the way I see the world when it's bad. Now, I just looked at this message!!! I can't write this long!!! Sorry, I got started and guess with you I must remind myself to stop. It does feel wonderful to share these personal, real parts of my life with someone I'm sure really understands what I'm saying. Understands what I'm feeling. Another deep breath....thanks for being on this Mayo site, Sue. Thanks for sharing. You are a gift to me. I hope I can return the favor. Blessings in this journey. Elizabeth