I am so very sorry for your loss. There is a lot of loss in breast cancer, much of which is never discussed by the people trying to save our lives. The oncology medical teams get very focused on stopping the cancer which of course is very important. I was treated locally and found that as long as I was breathing, I was supposed to be happy. My husband was treated at Mayo, and I learned that he was supposed to be “LIVING” with cancer. I now find myself accepting the outward signs of cancer treatments, but it has been a long journey. In my 30s, I lost most of one breast and my hair, along with 45 pounds of muscle during chemo. In my early 40’s, my hair came back thinner than before, I was on fire most of the time, and I began to wrinkle as the tamoxifen and anastrazole did their job.. Now in my 50’s, I am still on fire many times a day, my hair in thin and I am getting older and brittle as time goes by. However, time has gone by and my husband and I just celebrated our silver wedding anniversary. I don’t look in the mirror with disdain over thin hair and wrinkles anymore because I am grateful for the life I have. I do take care of my balance as I learned the hard way I do break easily as women in their older years tend to do. Use whatever tools you find to mitigate the damage, grieve the losses, there will be more along the way. Then make the most of every day because you are on bonus time now, and I promise you will look back and smile.