I am glad @fiesty76 started this discussion, and no doubt more than who have responded, have sat up and taken stock of where they are.
For some reason or another, so many of us are hesitant to get things in order. It might signify we understand our mortality here on earth, it might look to others we are figuring to pass soon, there are a multitude of reasons. In 2015, I was single, and had been diagnosed with a rare kidney disease. There is no treatment, and it may progress rapidly, or slowly. So, I got all my affairs in order, including planning for end-of-life wishes, prepaying for final costs, DPOA, will, etc. I even wrote my own obituary. Morbid? No. I come from a legal background, and had seen the consequence of more than one person passing with no arrangements or determinations expressed.
Forward now to my current situation, where I am married, we own joint property, but there are still individual assets. It is an ongoing struggle to get my husband to commit to putting things in writing. My explanation that "saying it" doesn't mean it will hold up in court of law has not penetrated into his brain, yet.
One thing I have insisted on, is that I carry two medications lists. One is my own list, that is kept updated. Also, I keep a typed out list of what my husband takes. If he were to have a crisis, I need to be able to give this info to a medical professional. Not at home on the computer. Right there in my purse. I am signed up for MedicAlert, and wear a MedicAlert bracelet. There is a phone number and record ID that a medical professional can access to get my meds and conditions, if need be. It gives me peace of mind. https://www.medicalert.org/
Before the end of the year, I will have all paperwork in place, again, with my husband's input and everything current. My goal, my promise to myself.
Ginger
@gingerw, Thank you so much for your post. I wish I could impress on your hubby and so many others who put off creating their estate plans and final wishes the importance of doing so. It took a stroke for me to realize the urgency in updating my affairs and making them readily available for my daughter. The peace of mind I have, like yours, of having my affairs in order is incomparable. "Saying it" as you wrote has no bearing in a court of law as my dear friend has recently learned the hardest of ways.
Because my best friends were not married and held both joint and separate accounts and properties like you and your hubby, they'd made individual wills and burial plans. However, lack of access to his partner's documents prevented my friend from carrying out her wishes and left him in terrible uncertainty about his own immediate and continuing access to the home they'd shared for over 20 years.
After 5 months of my friend's daughter creating daily sheer hell across the board with medical/home care/ investment/banking/insurance and other personnel involved, she confronted my friend with untenable ultimatums and choices regarding his continuation in the home my friends shared and maintained together.
Presented with agreements Saturday she'd had an atty. draw up for him to sign, he told her that she'd left him no choice but to start legal common law spousal actions earlier advised by his atty. She was shocked by his response. She was packed and along with her daughter and one dog was planning to finally absent the house today and return home to Denver. Now, re-negotiations will take place and this time with legal counsel.
Ginger, I especially thank you for the link to the medical alert site! I was unaware of this service and the i.d. options it offers! Yay! I'd looked at id to order at another time but didn't find anything that provided what I wanted like name/phone/addr. This org. sounds wonderful by providing the emergency info medical pros would need.
May I ask if you chose the bracelet or necklace for id? Would the dog tag necklace @$25 or mesh chain bracelet at $35 provide all I'd need? I couldn't tell from the site what info would be on either...just name? malady? Did you go with the Advantage Plan for $50/yr?
Because I am a frequent walker and have had a stroke, I am particularly interested in having immediate, on-person id that would alert someone for help.
I'll be calling the site this week and am delighted at the peace of mind it offers. If this is too off topic, could you please private message me about your choices if you feel comfortable doing so? Hugs and more! P.S. Would threatening your hubby with a shake to get going from a fiesty friend help prompt him to action? Smiles and a happy, safe and healthy Sunday to all who gather here.