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Prepared for a Medical Emergency?
Aging Well | Last Active: Oct 19, 2020 | Replies (23)Comment receiving replies
Here is another thought that isn't exactly the same, but in the same vein. We have a number of bank, investment, insurance & retirement accounts, not all local. My husband takes care of some, I take care of others. Also many bills are paid automatically out of one or another of the accounts.
We have started a single email account where we direct all "paperless" statements and notices for these accounts and both of us have access. We also have a list of all passwords in our safe (& try to keep it updated.) Our daughters know the location of the information & the combination to the safe (a number meaningful to all of us.) This way, should anything happen to either or both of us, there is a way to retrieve the needed financial information. Our wills, living wills, etc are in the same place, along with car titles & real estate info. As we eventually make final arrangements & create durable powers of attorney we will include that information as well. It was simple to deal with my Mom's final dispositions as she had done all of it in advance, and I want to do the same for my kids.
Sue
Replies to "Here is another thought that isn't exactly the same, but in the same vein. We have..."
I know it took me a while(in my early 60's, so often thinking "oh, I'm too young for doing this, I'll get to it") but in last couple of months I've gotten a safe deposit box @ credit union(sister has the other key) for vehicle title, extra copies of auto & renter's insurance policies; and almost ready to prepare the living will & DPOA. Atleast for now, several real close relatives know my health-care wishes & it's in my medical chart @ doctor's office. So, slowly am attacking this somewhat-daunting task & giving myself a little credit for that. Every little step is getting me more organized & prepared. Then, finding it bit easier to relax. My Mom had everything in order & passed away of complications d/t Alzheimers so was good that she'd done it years before.
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@sueinmn, Yes! My best friends did much the same and set up individual as well as joint accounts which worked beautifully for them until my friend became incapacitated.
Once living together, they also made separate wills which clearly spelled out their intentions ( he has 5 children; she, one) and also had drawn up separate burial and funeral arrangements at a local cemetery. The problem came when they didn't put original wills and burial plans in a bank safety deposit. Instead, they held those in a home safe which the daughter gained access to. The daughter refused my friend access to her mother's will and final plans and as a result sheer bedlam ensued. Luckily, he had given one daughter a set of both documents of his but the unnecessary stress and grief caused by this disruptive mom's daughter has been a constant nightmare that hasn't stopped yet.
Years ago, I attended a seminar for caregivers put on by our hospital. It was truly helpful and I found it a source of encouragement and information I needed. However, I was utterly shocked at how many attendees there had not given thought to taking actions now that could save them a great deal of time and prevent a great deal of difficulty and stress later. Many found it difficult talking to spouse, parent, children about declining health and end of life plans. I hope these posts will alert others who may have been putting plans off for "someday" to reconsider how much easier taking action now can save in grief for those you love later. Best to all.