Hey Jen, I am so sorry that your family or some of your family are like that. That is a drag and a half to say the least! Kaiser Permanente has a pain management team with all kinds of Specialists on it; addiction, Psychiatry Etc and they met with my doctor, my husband and myself, years ago just because they wanted me to know they validate me. I know I've shared before that I have a very, very long list of diseases and conditions, several of which are extremely painful. It meant the world to me that they validated me especially after some 23 + years on pain meds of some kind or another. I have an aversion to them so it took them and my husband and my primary care doctor and other of my specialist, about 3 years to talk me into taking pain medications in the first place. I do not want to be on them and I do not like them. I never ever feel any kind of high or euphoria but they have improved my functionality in life which is still quite poor but nonetheless better than without. Pain meds come with their own bag of problems besides stigma. I can't remember if you have ever said whether or not you have tried Gabapentin? Many people do not have side effects but I have many side effects from it but it helps me tolerate my pain. Both those medications, opiates and Gabapentin, do not take away pain. I feel they just sort of dull your pain to a somewhat tolerable level. I absolutely hate the side effects from Gabapentin they are terrible but I don't know what else to do because there would be zero quality of life without it. You know that pain that just eats away at your sanity, that's how it is without Gabapentin. People love to gossip and I feel it is most often when they need to feel better about themselves. Speculation. Lack of anything else to do but talk about someone else. It does really hurt a lot I know but if you can try not to think about it and distract those thoughts away, and focus on something else, or, as you know I would say, talk to the Lord about it. I had a pastor who used to say that Jeremiah 33:3 was God's phone number. Here is what it says "Call to me and I will answer you and tell you great and unsearchable things you do not know." Jesus knew how much people hated Him and talked about Him behind His back. He was rejected of men and did not have a place to lay his head. He gets it and would be the perfect one to talk to about it. He loves it when we engage with Him. The Bible says he created us for his glory and for us to fellowship with him. I can't imagine almighty God, creator of the universe , wants a relationship with us! He bore our sorrows and our griefs when He was on the cross (Isaiah 53:4). This morning I saw a quote that said God is not a distant God, a God to be feared and avoided, a God of revenge but a God who is moved by our pain and willingly chose to participate in the fullness of the human struggle so that we could know Him and that He understands. I have to admit I added just a couple of words but just a couple. Do you have any family members that you are close to? Have you ever talked to any of the ones who are judging you and gossiping about you? Just wondering. Well Jen, please no I will be upholding you in prayer and wish I could do so much more. You have my heart, Sunny flower. 🤗🌹💗🙏