Hank, you made me laugh! 😂 It's all a front LOL! Just kidding. Believe me, I struggle, cry and fight for my sanity daily but and am very deliberate and determined, with God's help, to represent Christ in my character, attitude, outlook, heart, etc. I am so very grateful that God has allotted me an extra measure of faith and, I try so hard in the midst of my pain to keep what my 2nd grade teacher wrote about me on my report card, "a sunny disposition". I pray that I will never miss a need. I am humbly aware that it is only by the grace of God go I. I am acutely aware of my blessings and the presence of God at all times, no matter how intolerable my pain becomes. I rely heavily on the bible. God's word is living and changes hearts- Hebrews 4:12 "For the word of God is alive and active. Sharper than any double-edged sword, it penetrates even to dividing soul and spirit, joints and marrow; it judges the thoughts and attitudes of the heart." and that is where I find the peace of God through Christ that surpasses all human understanding that I'm always talking about - Philippians 4:7" And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus" This life is so hard. We all walk through many fires but knowing it's only temporary in light of all eternity, helps me a lot.

I know a lot of what I 've said here is a repeat. I just can't remember who or where I said it.

I am really afraid that my poor memory (which I believe is the Gabapentin), is going to irritate or offend some of the beautiful people on the blog bc of my repeats. This is a problem in other areas of my life. For example, I have many medical appointments a lot. I had 3 referrals at once so today I called one that I was referred to, to schedule an appointment. They told me I already have one. Oh my gracious I was so embarrassed! I even have it in both my phone and wall calendars!! I think about this problem all the time. Oh my.

Thanks so much for being so patient and supportive. It means a lot to me!! Warmest regards and a zillion blessings to you and your wife, Sunny. 😊