Hi @mothergoose76, I'm new here but I have 8+ years of sobriety and have been in your shoes. I actually worked for the lady I'm referring to part time. We had gone through treatment together and she apparently thought she was 'cured' so she didn't bother to get a sponsor and work the steps. Simply put, she was a toxic dry drunk and I had to cut her out of my life to protect my sobriety. That is my #1 priority because without that, everything else goes away anyway.
It's been my experience that a dry drunk is someone who isn't drinking but they're still a jerk. Have you heard the expression "10% drink, 90% think"?
Do you have a sponsor?