@georgette12 I've also tried art journaling, like collage, or even just coloring or doodling without words when I don't/can't write because words are too much. Too revealing. You might try some adult coloring books. One I found helpful is on mandalas which helps me to focus on intricate patterns that can be filled in with gel pens, markers, colored pencils.
When all else fails I just cry to hopefully get the feelings out versus constantly in my head. This COVID situation is bringing lots of old stuff for me too.
One last recommendation is a book someone just sent me My Friend Fear by Meera Lee Patel.

@georgette12 Sometimes putting things down on paper takes away their energy. I have found that to work for me. It frees up my mind to place in more positive things. Sometimes I reread old entries, but not very often. In my journals, the end of the book itself often contains poetry or essays I have written, dated, so I don't want to simply destroy my journals.

Remember, tears can be healing. I liked reading about your time spent at that program in Arizona. It must have been very insightful for you and others. A non-threatening way to see within you, and release some stress, yes?

@marjou mentioned art journaling, which I have also tried. At one time I was part of a recovery group that did "write and share" as their format. Given a topic, we wrote, some shared their writings, and it was a way to feel connected to others experiencing similar feelings or issues. Even now, using a word, or saying as a jump-off point to writing, can bring some fascinating results. Perhaps trying any of these ideas may be helpful. Would you think of trying one of these?
Ginger