@IndianaSc I so agree I lost my husband 20 yrs ago and lost more then sex ,lost him

Yes you are right. When he is sick, with so many diseases, I often think that I am glad I have him still. Although I am 5 years older than he is, I am in 99% perfect health so may be left alone one day. A thought I hate to consider. Hoping you all are able to do what Scott said, "Focus on what we do have." Like one of my daughters said (regarding her husband), "It doesn't matter if he's not perfect, and if he is a bit messy. He is my husband!"

@IndianaScott I knew going in to our marriage, of my husband's kidney issues. I told him about my issues at that time. He did not sign on for the multiple myeloma that has reared its head in me, nor did he sign on for the depression I work with each day [and all the nuances that has!]. We have talked plenty, and have tried to adopt the same attitude you eloquently point out. Thank you.

Thanks @IndianaScott for putting a different perspective out there! I too lost my spouse after a cancer battle (18 years married, 3 1/2 year cancer battle, with a 4YO son, who also died - 5 months after his father, due to an undiagnosed rare disease).

You're right, there is far more to miss. The travel adventures, the shared history, the private jokes, the companionship, the loss of dreams, the loss of security (both physical and financial).These things often seem amplified in today's out-of-control world. Like you said, just my two cents.

Your closing sentiment is beautiful - "Strength, courage and peace", and I echo it.