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Downsizing, To Move or Not to Move? That is the Question

Aging Well | Last Active: 3 hours ago | Replies (480)

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@gingerw

@anne59 and jude07 In 1986 my folks put their house of almost 30 years on the market. Well, it sold to the real estate appraiser who came to assess it, so it really did not hit the market. I don't think there was a lot of concrete plans of where they were moving. They went north and leased a condo for a year, then bought a new build house that shared a common wall. They were there maybe 4 years, and moved again, this time to Reno, NV, to a single level house. By this time my mother was into her Alzheimers and dementia, and passed in 1996. Each time they moved they down-sized. What was hardest for them both was leaving their roots in 1986, and all the friends/acquaintances they had. My mother isolated in her disease, and my father was her caretaker.He was isolated by circumstances of caretaking, as she refused any outsiders in to the house. My dad continued to move around for another 16 years after her death, ending in a one bedroom apartment as part of a senior community.

For me, I moved from everyone I knew in 2018, to join my husband in his city. New city, new people, new stores, new medical, you name it. It was overwhelming. I became involved in a couple of volunteer activities, that interested me, and learned to meet people that way. As an introvert, it was not easy. And a year later, in July last year, I did it again, moving 800 miles away, to our retirement property. Once more it was imperative to get to know a few people in this small town, as I was "holding down the fort" while he continued to work. It is not impossible, it takes work, and you find out how mentally strong you are. Key for me has been careful planning as much as you can.
Ginger

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Replies to "@anne59 and jude07 In 1986 my folks put their house of almost 30 years on the..."

Ginger, As a total extrovert, I have a hard time imagining such a move, and meeting new people & hearing new stories is energizing to me. I admire you for managing this not once, but twice as an introvert.
I was amazed in my Psych 101 class to learn of these concepts - I always thought there was something "wrong" with my shy & introverted cousins. We finally concluded that I got all of the extrovert genes, and they got all the introvert ones, if there is such a thing. When we started kindergarten, one of my cousins had to be moved to the same class as me because she wouldn't speak to anyone else in the school - even the teacher!
Sue