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How do you accept change as you age?
Aging Well | Last Active: Nov 7, 2020 | Replies (277)Comment receiving replies
Oh my, what a great lifter upper you are. Thank you for such encouragement and because of your words I feel so much better. I too am an A type personality, I am also an Aries, born in March, not that I know a lot about all that, but I know from what I've heard I fit the description of Aries almost to the tee. I have always been stubborn, fiery, and definitely know what I want and know how to get it. So, yes I haven't changed much in that regard. I am also very determined and willful. As a child I was all over the place, nothing or no one could change my mind once it was made up. Thank God I never outgrew these traits, because they are what has gotten me through a lot of hard times. However, now they can get in the way. I was mowing the grass, ( I have a little over an acer to mow) I got off the mower to move something and stepped in a hole and fell. I've lived here for nearly 20 years and never knew that dang hole was there. My 10 year old great grandson was here and came over and tried to help me up. I wasn't sure if I was hurt or not so I chose to just lay there a couple of minutes and see how I felt. After I got up I just kinda shook off what little pain I was having in my right side, got back on the mower and finished mowing. When I was finished, I took a shower, ate something and went to bed. The next day the pain in my side was worse so I took my grandson home and went on to the VA. where it was determined, I had 2 broken ribs and a third one was badly bruised. I had banged up my rt. knee a little but I was okay. Boy my granddaughter had a short fit. I say short because I told her it could have happened to anyone and that I didn't want to hear anymore about it. The lesson I learned was not that I fell but that even a SIMPLE fall at my age can bring devastating results so now I am a lot more careful. I have always had a fear of falling and that fall was a clear wake up call. That dang hole was immediately filled in. The reason I am telling you all this is because I need you to understand that now I believe there is a fine line between being stubborn and determined and being just plain stupid. As we grow older, we are suppose to grow wiser, at least that's what I have always believed but I tell you, right now I have a few doubts about my wisdom. LOL. Your most welcomed post has validated a lot for me. I know I really need to start taking it easier. I know I have to come to grips with the fact that I just simply can't do certain things any more. And you are so so right in saying we are entitled to take it easy and do what we can when we can. That's what I have been doing and then I get frustrated, but from now on I am going to be easier on ME too. I am going to refuse to feel frustrated anymore. You're also right about nursing being hard on one's back. I wish I had a nickel for every time I lifted, pushed or pulled on a patient and felt my back ache. Not to mention being on my feet everyday for 6-7 hours a day. When I got a little older it was so bad I could hardly make it up the 4 steps to get in my house. I have done private duty for the past 8 years full time but about 4 years ago I had to drop back to part time, 2-4 days a week. then a little over a year ago I had to drop back to one day a week. I retired 6 years ago but in Jan. of this year I decided to stop working all together. That's another hurdle I am trying to jump. I miss working, I miss my patient, I miss doing my nurse thingy. I had to realize that working only made matters worse. So reality has set in and frankly I don't like it, but this time I can't fight it, I can't get my own way this time so I will accept it and do what I can, when I can and be thankful that I have finally come to my senses and you my dear friend have been a great help in that decision. Yes, I have crafts I like to do, watch TV, documentaries are heavy on my list, I also read non-fiction on angles, life after death, etc. I also enjoy anything about gardening, household hints and do it yourself info. I am interested in alternative medicine and survival foods and techniques. I try to learn something new everyday. Oh yes before I forget, thank you for the tips about threads on the forum for walking and the chair exercises, I will definitely check it out. I didn't mean to write a short novel, I love to write so it's easy for me to get carried away. Please let me hear from you soon. and again, thank you for your kind and encouraging words. God bless Jeanie
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Enjoyed your post so much, @jeanie26. I think an Aries and a Leo share a lot in common. My mom used to groan that I came out of the shell, stubborn, opinionated and fiercely protective of others..Hmmm, while my shelved book of Heloise Hints grows dust, my passion for being outdoors and gardening is my bit of heaven where I forget everything and have laser sight when a weed appears. Window washing? Not so much. Like you, I gave 150% to my career in education and absolutely loved my work and associations. However, when two close administrator friends died suddenly in their 50's, one from heart attack, the other from brain aneurysm, I determined that I did not want to die on the job. I'd been carefully planning financially for retirement for years. What I had not given any thought to was how I would wake up with no calendar crammed full of appointments, meetings, deadlines. In TX, full retirement meant hitting the magic number 80, based on age and number of years in the system. What I didn't prepare for was not realizing that the majority of my friends were still employed or happily married with bridge, book clubs, or other couple pursuits in place. After the first week or two of my retirement "vacation", I thought, oh my word, how am I going to spend the rest of my life??? At a book club I joined I mentioned that I was considering approaching our college continuing ed. dept with the idea of a course for: Preparing for Retirement. They all laughed; thought that was absurd...Of course they were either still working or juggling full calendars of diversions that kept them busy and fulfilled. I was lost at first until gradually gravitating to the yard where I began converting a very bland landscape into one that eventually led to both yards being professionally landscaped for flower and veggie gardening. As I made new friends and others retired, they teased that they knew not to call me until mid-afternoons because they knew I'd be outside. Until retirement, cooking had been more of a necessity and chore than pleasure. Eventually I became interested in trying new recipes. Although I had a bakers shelf devoted to cookbooks, I'd rarely explored them. Far more gratifying to find online recipes because they include enticing photos! When three diagnoses of pre-diabetes, stage 3 chronic kidney disease (ckd) and diverticulitis struck last year, I was so grateful that adopting new diets could improve my lab numbers. I discovered the Connect group because Mayo had long been my first search in exploring maladies and their treatment. So glad I did because the kidney group proved invaluable in learning more about how to maintain and make adjustments based on lab values. Reflecting back on that initial retirement adjustment, I wonder now why the goal setting, list making me didn't give thought or planning to what would become the happiest, least stressful period of my life.