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How do you accept change as you age?
Aging Well | Last Active: Nov 7, 2020 | Replies (277)Comment receiving replies
Hi, @jeanie26, I'm adding another welcome to our seniors group. Like you, I'm not into white water rafting, smile, but I was always very active and energetic. Any chronic pain and specifically back pain which resulted from an injury in trying to reposition my mom in the car can stop us in our tracks. I have osteoporosis and both high and low b.p. The sudden bouts of hypotension make me a fall risk. There is a walking/exercise thread on the forum that provides opportunities for those of us at all levels of ability and endurance to participate in to keep us motivated. There have been good links posted for armchair and balancing. I was not only shocked but deeply offended when it dawned on me that I could no longer do all that for most of my life I'd taken for granted. Learning to actually accept some limitations was a very real struggle for me. At 76, I'm ahead of you in years but I guarantee you that coming to the acceptance that I needed to focus on what I could still do, although for much shorter periods and some things not at all anymore, has been a daunting task for one who thought of herself as a lady Hercules. With your career as a nurse, I am surprised that you are moving at all! So much lifting, turning, and assisting patients has to have taken a huge toll on one's back. As an extended family caregiver, I salute you and all nurses as the medical angels you are! If the truth were told, I imagine the thought of losing our independence is one of the largest concerns most of us consider as we celebrate more birthdays. I live alone and find vacuuming and cleaning tubs and commodes my hardest household tasks because of the bending. In my book that you are doing your lawn and driving a riding mower says a great deal about your determination and effort to remain as active as possible. Two years ago, I helped my daughter restain her large surround porch and I can promise you I was reaching for some muscle relaxants so kudos to you for tackling your porch painting...that is work new friend! Personally, I've learned that slowing down for me is just what "is". Now, instead of fuming because I can't do what I could before, I've come to terms with that and just feel like on those off days that just "still being here is quite enough". After all, we spent years working to provide for ourselves and others; now it is our turn to do at our own pace. As a friend told me long ago: C+ is still passing....for a type A personality then, that was hard to swallow. Now, if I choose not to push for a day or two, I figure I'm entitled. Do you have purely for pleasure hobbies that hold your interest? I read murder mysteries and biographies for escape before bed and play online games; watch documentaries and PBS with some Netflix thrown in for good measure. What about you?
Replies to "Hi, @jeanie26, I'm adding another welcome to our seniors group. Like you, I'm not into white..."
@gayle1, Hi, Gayle, I noticed you liked an earlier post so checked your profile. I'm glad to be meeting you here for the first time. It sounds as though you have truly been through the wringer with medical issues. I am so sorry you have born the results of the opiods that are changing so many lives in harmful ways. You mentioned in your profile that you are bedridden now. Are you able to use your hands to read, change tv channels, or do any crafts, work puzzles? While differing health issues brought us to this wonderful Connect group, have you found as I have that regardless of the specific malady, participants are all so supportive and interesting to get to know a little better? I first joined the Kidney/Bladder group when first diagnosed with stage 3 chronic kidney disease (CKD) nearly a year ago. Starting the Covid-19 forums has been a wonderful addition to the health specific groups. Do you participate in the Just Want to Talk, Visuals, or other interest groups? Again, thank you for reading and liking my post.
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Oh my, what a great lifter upper you are. Thank you for such encouragement and because of your words I feel so much better. I too am an A type personality, I am also an Aries, born in March, not that I know a lot about all that, but I know from what I've heard I fit the description of Aries almost to the tee. I have always been stubborn, fiery, and definitely know what I want and know how to get it. So, yes I haven't changed much in that regard. I am also very determined and willful. As a child I was all over the place, nothing or no one could change my mind once it was made up. Thank God I never outgrew these traits, because they are what has gotten me through a lot of hard times. However, now they can get in the way. I was mowing the grass, ( I have a little over an acer to mow) I got off the mower to move something and stepped in a hole and fell. I've lived here for nearly 20 years and never knew that dang hole was there. My 10 year old great grandson was here and came over and tried to help me up. I wasn't sure if I was hurt or not so I chose to just lay there a couple of minutes and see how I felt. After I got up I just kinda shook off what little pain I was having in my right side, got back on the mower and finished mowing. When I was finished, I took a shower, ate something and went to bed. The next day the pain in my side was worse so I took my grandson home and went on to the VA. where it was determined, I had 2 broken ribs and a third one was badly bruised. I had banged up my rt. knee a little but I was okay. Boy my granddaughter had a short fit. I say short because I told her it could have happened to anyone and that I didn't want to hear anymore about it. The lesson I learned was not that I fell but that even a SIMPLE fall at my age can bring devastating results so now I am a lot more careful. I have always had a fear of falling and that fall was a clear wake up call. That dang hole was immediately filled in. The reason I am telling you all this is because I need you to understand that now I believe there is a fine line between being stubborn and determined and being just plain stupid. As we grow older, we are suppose to grow wiser, at least that's what I have always believed but I tell you, right now I have a few doubts about my wisdom. LOL. Your most welcomed post has validated a lot for me. I know I really need to start taking it easier. I know I have to come to grips with the fact that I just simply can't do certain things any more. And you are so so right in saying we are entitled to take it easy and do what we can when we can. That's what I have been doing and then I get frustrated, but from now on I am going to be easier on ME too. I am going to refuse to feel frustrated anymore. You're also right about nursing being hard on one's back. I wish I had a nickel for every time I lifted, pushed or pulled on a patient and felt my back ache. Not to mention being on my feet everyday for 6-7 hours a day. When I got a little older it was so bad I could hardly make it up the 4 steps to get in my house. I have done private duty for the past 8 years full time but about 4 years ago I had to drop back to part time, 2-4 days a week. then a little over a year ago I had to drop back to one day a week. I retired 6 years ago but in Jan. of this year I decided to stop working all together. That's another hurdle I am trying to jump. I miss working, I miss my patient, I miss doing my nurse thingy. I had to realize that working only made matters worse. So reality has set in and frankly I don't like it, but this time I can't fight it, I can't get my own way this time so I will accept it and do what I can, when I can and be thankful that I have finally come to my senses and you my dear friend have been a great help in that decision. Yes, I have crafts I like to do, watch TV, documentaries are heavy on my list, I also read non-fiction on angles, life after death, etc. I also enjoy anything about gardening, household hints and do it yourself info. I am interested in alternative medicine and survival foods and techniques. I try to learn something new everyday. Oh yes before I forget, thank you for the tips about threads on the forum for walking and the chair exercises, I will definitely check it out. I didn't mean to write a short novel, I love to write so it's easy for me to get carried away. Please let me hear from you soon. and again, thank you for your kind and encouraging words. God bless Jeanie