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Caring for my husband with late-stage lung cancer
Lung Cancer | Last Active: Apr 16, 2020 | Replies (56)Comment receiving replies
No, I am fine. Just never thought dying would take so long. Now that we are confined because of the virus it seem I just sit here watching......at times I think the way he is looking, acting, reaching And Breathing I am sure he will pass. But this has been days and it is exhausting for both of us. I go through moments of tears.....other than morphine, pain pill, and something for agitation he has only had sips of water and applesauce. He doesn't want anything and I am told this is normal. I think I mentioned we live in an assisted living and I finally have them changing him......he was able to use the urinal up until three days ago....now I just sit, watch and pray.
Replies to "No, I am fine. Just never thought dying would take so long. Now that we are..."
@turtle115- As I watched my mother die I learned that death wasn't an event but a process. It can take a while for a body to slowly shut down. This is also a time for you to prepare for your inevitable loss. I know that you have been mourning him but now it's different. Here are some signs that might help you
https://www.crossroadshospice.com/hospice-caregiver-support/end-of-life-signs/
I found it a time that I faced my fears of dying. It didn't resolve until much later, but for me, it was a bit of a break-through. I spent the time sitting on my mom's bed and holding her hand. I talked to her and told her things that I probably never would have if she were cognizant. We had a rocky road together as mother and daughter. I made sure that her lips were moistened and I used a spongie type thing to keep her mouth a bit moist. I wanted to keep her comfortable and know that she was loved and well taken care of.
My moods were all over the place too and I just went with it.
It's exhausting and sad and also very special. I have found it an honor to be with someone when they die.
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@turtle115 I was just thinking about you today and wondering how you both are . It sounds like it wont be much longer then you both will be at peace . Do you have other people there to talk to in the assistant living place? Can you leave and get a cup of tea ? I know you dont want to leave him but it would be good for you to see some other scenery . May God hold you both in his arms Thoughts and prayers for you both