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@santolina You have shown us your bravery to post your story here. I am grateful to your sister, also, that she told you about this forum. Is she a member here, also?
I worked with racehorses for about 14 years, traveling all over the country, and learning what they had to teach me. Like you said, they were great educators on perseverance. Recall those lessons when you feel down, how you usually had that one many thought wouldn't "make it"? But that one horse kept trying, trusting you, and found a slightly different style or step, but would persevere and succeed. Recall that when you feel down. I had one fellow who was sour, and unhappy, and frankly overraced. But I took that as a challenge, found his "soft spot" and helped him become a happier horse.
You have a challenge around you each day. That is, to be nice to yourself, to value yourself, and know you are here for a reason. Don't forget to be kind to yourself, find a bit of happiness each day, whatever that might be. It may be a beautifully prepared meal, or a space decorated just so, or a garden planted. Can you use your experience with the horses to volunteer with a therapeutic riding group?
Please come back and let us know how you are today. We care!
Ginger
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Well, then. This made me cry....No, my sister had a random email or FB thing and forwarded it to me. IF I did not have to work life would be much easier. But when all you feel like is a paycheck to keep the household going, as my husband has medical issues that do not allow him to work as a full time plumber any longer, it is a requirement to keep going.
I think back on those fabulous creatures we apparently were both blessed to work with and smile. But there are no groups close to where I live that will work out because of my job and the random hours, shifts I get. Making a commitment to something like that is just not realistic, and not keeping my word is not something I can live with.
Some days are easier than others. The hard days oftentimes overwhelm but if I give in, my little family will be in some jeopardy and that is the chain that keeps me here. If they were not, I do not know if I would be. I SO appreciate this safe place.