I’m dealing as best I can— one day at a time.

One question I have before I answer you though, what do you mean by “well-rounded?” I am a little uh, chubby, but...

@bustrbrwn22
How are you dealing with this emotionally?
My whole identity was my job so realizing I’ll never be that person again is horrible.
You seem to be well-rounded person in that you have more in your life than work. You wrote books and have much love in your life. Doesn’t sound like you defined yourself by your work.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------
Thank you for your comments. It makes me joyful that you can see the ripe fruit and pluck it! That fruit being hope, prayer, love, support, and joy amidst an existence of extreme pain, isolation while suffering from the rarest, incurable, and painful disease known to man.
I won’t lie to you. My job was also my identity like you. I’m a Christian and for me, my job as a pharmacist was a way to help others and I did it FOR GOD. But God gives and takes away and we are not privy to what, when, how, where, and why. He also doesn’t need us to do anything FOR Him. I think this was the LAST and most PAINFUL lesson (literally) I have ever had to learn, at least so far.
In truth, I have never defined myself by my work. It is merely an extension of my life like my writing, or my hunting, or health. I have always known and agreed with God (I’m a Christian.) that the day anything stands between Him and me, it is to be removed or He is to make me aware of it. How am I supposed to be mad at God for doing what I ask? True, He could have done it differently, but wow, I learned powerful lessons His way. I still am, as you can see.
I still went through the GRIEF cycle and spent way too long in the DEPRESSION-ANGER rotation and I am extremely thankful my husband stuck by my side. It’s amazing how we get FOR AND WITH someone mixed up, isn’t it? It was during this time frame that I learned how a Christian relationship is supposed to be and one lives with God, and a wife and husband live with each other for life.
The adjustments are the hard part and are the things I’m still trying to come to terms with.
Such as:
1. Painting, candle-making, diamond-painting VS. Hiking, driving, wandering
2. Website building, blogging/vlogging, social media VS. Website shop, marketing, advertising
3. Online helps, activism/advocacy, support groups VS. depression, negativity, suicide
I believe faith without works is dead and salvation is only available through Jesus Christ. I’ve lived my life that way since I was eighteen. But it’s only in the last 3 years that I’ve had a deep relationship with the Father and Jesus through the Holy Spirit. I walk WITH God in a way never before NOT because it’s what I’m supposed to do or what the Bible tells me to do. OR even what a Christian does.
It’s how I survive each day. And I’m the happiest and most joyful person I’ve ever been in my entire life.
My husband loves me. I love him and God makes us complete.
I always say I wouldn’t wish this pain on my worst enemy but if it brought them to know Christ in this manner, maybe that wouldn’t be such a bad idea…
I’ll leave that to the Lord. Lol I hope this helps. If you have any questions or need clarification, simply ask!
Renee
@faithwalker007