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Im learning to accept that it is what it is. Hes handicap, he has limitations- that will never change because he chooses to stay that way. I get that era "type" you speak of, but only accept it to an extent. Its sad, but i tried. Now i have to try and move on while living with him, try to balance my mixed emotions, and figure out how our transactions should go. I honestly have too much bs in my life, no one should have to do this.

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Replies to "Im learning to accept that it is what it is. Hes handicap, he has limitations- that..."


I get it. I don't like putting people in a box, though each generation does have some general character traits, and there are the cultural habits, etc. Some of the attitudes of my parents' generation were great, but others not so much. Having said that, we learned some things from them, particularly some child rearing issues.

I grew up with 5 siblings, in smallish homes, so no privacy. I think that I survived childhood better than my brothers and sisters, probably because of my natural submissive personality. I didn't do all of the forbidden behaviors that I saw the others doing, so I didn't get into trouble. I did get my share of spankings, though.

As an adult, I didn't live very close to my parents, so as the saying goes, absence makes the heart grow fonder. I always loved my Mom and Dad and I knew that they loved me, though Dad had a tough time expressing it. My father was a minister, and at his last church he asked me to be his assistant pastor. Sometimes I kinda wish I accepted the offer, but I know that it would have been a real challenge. For one thing, they weren't very good at being in-laws. I believe that I'd have felt like his child, and I really didn't want that. They weren't perfect, but I loved and respected them.

I hope you can carve out your personal space in your father's house. Have you talked with a counselor about the difficulties you're facing? Therapy has kept me alive, and being able to text with a couple of friends about the sensitive things I live with has been a real help.