@iceblue, @johnbishop, @artscaping, What a challenge for you @iceblue to regain your focus on your health. What a great article @johnbishop emphasizing absolutely essential steps to manage flare-ups or other pain that is stress-related.

It does require some effort. Keep a journal. Develop tested workarounds for known stress hurdles. At first glance, it seems like a lot of work. It is essential for us to do if we want to stay in control of our bodies.

Years ago, my colleagues and I were talking with clients about the limitations we have to fight stress. At that time, we were stating that you cannot stack more than 2 stress hurdles at a time. In your situation.... the first stressor is your brother's passing....you have acknowledged your feelings and grief and will begin to treasure memories Then stressor #2, caregiver for your mother. You may need counseling or clinician support to establish some workable boundaries but you can do this. Stressor #3, your stepfather. That overloads the wagon and your pain will let you know how weighty this extra load actually is.

You can't expect to come up breathing in a world of no pain if you pile a move, and a new job on top of a bad relationship, etc. Maybe I need to be open enough to share my battle scars. Last year, I was a caregiver for my life partner as he went through seven weeks of radiation treatment during which time, we were in Rochester. I did pretty well and kept my small fiber neuropathy quiet by finding a distraction: checking out the amazing art on all 19 floors of the Gonda Bldg at Mayo Clinic.

Unexpectedly, I found out my house had sold after only one week and the close was scheduled for 4 days after the radiation treatments ended. I'm beginning to get a little busy with details and a little buzzy in the head with needle-like pain. I begin to notice that my hands, wrists, and arms are more painful every day...or the pain begins sooner.

Finally, I flew back, signed papers and felt nothing....no sadness....just relief. Then came the overloaded wagon.....I had to say goodbye to twenty years of friends. My heart was breaking because I knew that at 77 years of age, the likelihood that I would see them again was fading.

How can we help you map your journey to ward off stress in your immediate future? How can adjustments be made in your personal boundaries? Do you practice yoga or mindful meditation? You are already strong, so may you be safe and protected. Chris