Here is the Readers Digest version since there is so much nuance involved, I am happy to elaborate if anyone would like to know more on any of the points below.
1. I took several tear stained assessments and, through what I now feel was divine intervention, wound up at an outpatient treatment center for women called Residence XII in Kirkland, WA where I surrendered and learned how not to "should" on myself any longer.
2. Saturated myself in recovery information through reading and audio materials while attending sober functions where I eventually learned how to get comfortable with others and myself without self medicating for anxiety.
3. Attended three or more different meetings a week Living in a large metropolis I was blessed with the opportunity to try on all different kinds of meetings.
4. Found a women's AA home group and a sponsor
5. Began working the steps with my sponsor
6. Learned how to pray and meditate with my Higher Power
7. Took care of my body through a nutritious diet, exercise and rest when I needed it. Payed attention to when i was Hungry, Angry, Lonely or Tired, aka HALT.
8. Began accepting service work c(at the urge of my sponsor) right away starting with making coffee for my home group, then branching out to the AA district and then sponsorship. Sponsorship is the number one thing that helps keep me emotionally sober to this day!!!
9. Through the above process I was able to determine the need for further help via private counseling for about two years after I finished treatment. It saved my marriage.
Anyone reading this, I hope you take what you can use and let the rest go for now. Serenity, courage, and wisdom to you all.