← Return to My perfectionist family is causing my depression even worse

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@guener

I am a perfectionist at heart, I internalize everything that could be critical if I don't check myself. It seems to me that you are placing a great deal of emphasis on the recognition from your family that you are living up to their expectations. I see that they do place extremely and probably overly high standards for you to reach, but it seems that you are regardless doing quite well with your own achievements. I am going to make an assumption that you are living at home by custom and not by choice, and that you do not have an option to become independent at the moment or to change your situation readily, and that is fine. Being in such a position, I myself would listen less to my family and place more worth on the external *evidence* that you are, in fact, a successful person. Yes, we may become irritated at others who fail to see us as we think we are, or actually are, but that is their issue and will probably not change much with respect to you. What is important is you see your value in yourself and for your own well-being.

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Replies to "I am a perfectionist at heart, I internalize everything that could be critical if I don't..."

Hello @guener,
You have given, @aliali, some important thoughts about valuing herself rather than being intimidated by her family's opinions of her. I hope she is able to begin the process of valuing herself without being intimidated by her family's notions.

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