← Return to My perfectionist family is causing my depression even worse

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@hopeful33250

@aliali
Just wondering, @aliali, and please only answer these questions as you feel comfortable doing so. Are you able to support yourself?

Have you ever read about assertiveness? It is how to express your feelings without hurting the feelings of others. If you can go to your library they might be able to suggest books on the topic. Here are some websites that discuss assertiveness,
https://www.mayoclinic.org/healthy-lifestyle/stress-management/in-depth/assertive/art-20044644
https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/basics/assertiveness
Here are some books listed on Amazon that teach about assertiveness,
https://www.amazon.com/s?k=assertiveness&hvadid=77927890511264&hvbmt=be&hvdev=c&hvqmt=e&tag=mh0b-20&ref=pd_sl_54fylwa0r5_e
Are you in a counseling situation now? It might help to be part of group therapy as well.

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Replies to "@aliali Just wondering, @aliali, and please only answer these questions as you feel comfortable doing so...."

@hopeful33250
The answer for each question is No. I will try to get more information regarding assertiveness. I feel self-help techniques are better for me than seeking the physical help.

@hopeful33250, @aliali, Good morning. Those are great recommendations, Teresa. I think that perfectionism is also one of the OCD symptoms. My granddaughter spent 6 mos at Rogers Behavioral Center trying to get over the perfectionism demanded by her father. It is still a difficult hurdle to jump. He would often tear up an assignment that she had just spent several hours to complete, telling her it wasn't good enough. She told me in tears that she didn't think she could ever please her dad. The fact that he committed suicide when she was 15, left her with lots of guilt.

I also remember that I learned the techniques of Assertiveness Training at the University of Connecticut in the 1970s. I then taught my clients and held group sessions about the process. Glad that it is still around and helping folks. May you both have a free from suffering day. Chris