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Grief: My 'bad' coping mechanism experience

Loss & Grief | Last Active: Nov 15, 2019 | Replies (36)

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wow,, so um,, I have AGAIN... lost a close person in my life. A Very good friend and (well,, he was family ,,we loved him that much), shot himself 2 days ago. I spent all day yesterday in bed. I lost my sobriety that night. I DID walk away from a razor. Held it to my stomach and pushed in ,, and put it back. ( small pat on the back). I do understand why he did it. And I respect and support it.,,but,, it still hurts. I'm still in shock. When the Sheriff came out to the house, I was only 20 mins home from work ( in which I had a LONG 1.5 hour talk with my boss about my last 8 months of pain). And, the night before, I had relived all thru my sister's death... again till 5 AM. So, I was already near the rabbit hole. I just don't know how much more I can take.

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Replies to "wow,, so um,, I have AGAIN... lost a close person in my life. A Very good..."

and then I just read the tragedy that was just posted above.. CRAP!!!! I feel so bad for that family.......

@mcmurf2 I am so sorry to know that you have experienced yet another loss and this from suicide. You have my sympathies!

I would encourage you to read some of the other posts of Connect Members who have experienced loss through suicide. Here is the link to those posts, https://connect.mayoclinic.org/discussion/suicide-1/?commentsorderby=DESC#chv4-comment-stream-header

Here is some information from the Survivors of Suicide website, https://elunanetwork.org/resources/survivors-of-suicide-sos-group-finder/, that I thought might be helpful to you.

Could you share a little about your friend? Often just writing about a person you have lost is good therapy. Connect is here to listen and care.

@mcmurph2. Hello. My daughter lost her closest friend to suicide 7 months ago. Her friend was 31 yrs old. I see the grief, guilt and hell my daughter is experiencing; so yours is quite tangible to me. I am going to guide my daughter to one of the Suicide Survivors support groups that Teresa mentioned. I know you are having a tough time and my heart goes out to you. You have had two recent major losses; that is enough to turn anybody upside down. They say grief is work. It takes time to work through the grief. Give yourself that time. It is ok and normal to feel horrible when these kinds of things happen. The more you try to hide from these feelings with substance abuse, the longer it will take for you to work through the steps of grief. I have faith that you will get there. Hugs.