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Grief: My 'bad' coping mechanism experience

Loss & Grief | Last Active: Nov 15, 2019 | Replies (36)

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HI Teresa. um,, wow.. um,, in the last 12 hours.. I have taken a painful but needed journey. I had been reaching out for a long time. .. got a lot of doors slammed in my face and a lot of walls and just not the right 'groups' on the computer. I knew there was SOMEONE in y FB friends that was 'the one' but it only was 'shown' to me last night... All this time.. always the wrong person... but .. It was just shown to me... I contacted her. we talked till after 1:00 AM. ... She is 19 years clean. long story short... I have decided to go to NA.... sometime...I have to travel 1.5 hours away... But , I know I need this. I have been really trying with myself .. especially after picking a new phsyc. dr. ..my thoughts now are : IF I hand picked this Dr, and expect HER to help me and trust me,,, I better start trying harder...

To answer your questions, I am 55, my sister would have been 63. She was my rock.. she was the only person that understood me. She was always looking out for me and we had wonderful adventures together all around the US. She left for the military when I was in 4th grade.. but we always remained close.

The person I talked to last night is also going to be my sponsor.. .. sooooooooo with that.. and I start intensive DBT training next week... maybe I"ll be ok...........................but at this time.. I cannot trust myself with the next 24,,, 72 hours...Always waiting to be 'set off'...

Thank you both ( Teresa and Ginger) for responding back to me .. it means a lot.... ... It was a reach out that wasn't a wall... so thank you...

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Replies to "HI Teresa. um,, wow.. um,, in the last 12 hours.. I have taken a painful but..."

@mcmurf2 Don't forget to thank yourself for reaching out that one more time on the computer. I am a firm believer that our support system shows up to us when we are finally ready and have our eyes/hearts/minds open for the support. Each challenge is a challenge to be dealt with, no doubt, and may entail hard work. When you look back, in weeks to come, you'll be amazed at the progress, and wonder at the journey. If you are ready, keep a journal; I have found those invaluable. And remember you have us here, to help you as we can. We are a great sounding board, and will share our experiences, strength and hopes. There is the "One Day at a Time" aspect of recovery, but sometimes that is too much. So, break it down to an hour at a time if need be. Keep checking in. We care.

Hello again, @mcmurf2

I am so glad that you are starting the process of reaching out. Please remember this is a process and each day is a new day!
Will you post now and then?