← Return to Alzheimers: When should someone not be left alone?

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Hi @suerc - I think the issue of when its safe to leave a dementia patient alone is one of the most difficult ones that caregivers face. Everyone is different. And even in the same person, capabilities can vary from day to day. My guess is that if you are seeing issues, the wife has already seen them and is trying to deal with them. My heart goes out to anyone who is trying to care for both her husband with Alzheimers and her elderly dad. If you are close to her and you are starting to worry about what you are seeing, I would suggest talking to her and letting her know you want to help. Having that conversation might also give you some insight into how mild or advanced his condition is. My husband has dementia. I am so fortunate to have lovely, caring neighbors. They take extra time to chat with him when he's out working in the yard and to check on him if anything looks out of the ordinary. If I'm away, they will look in on him from time to time. Right now, that's all we need and it gives me peace of mind without having to hire someone to stay with him - which he would resent and probably refuse right now. Have you had any one-on-one interaction with the wife? If you decide to, I would suggest inviting her over for coffee/tea so she is able to talk freely without concern of the husband being right around the corner.

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Replies to "Hi @suerc - I think the issue of when its safe to leave a dementia patient..."

@debbraw Very valid points you brought up. Boy, this gal is probably so torn and weary, perhaps she is hoping what she may be seeing in either her husband or dad are not as severe as they may be. @suerc If there are any family members [siblings/grandchildren/niece/nephew] hopefully she will approach them for their help. Most towns have a respite care system; in a town I lived in there was an order of nuns who were nurses, and did respite care regardless of faith. Also there are caregivers' groups. I wager she will welcome that coffee and a chance to talk.