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Possible Depression & ADHD - Need Advice & Support.
Depression & Anxiety | Last Active: Sep 27, 2019 | Replies (61)Comment receiving replies
@greymelody Good morning, Melody. Feeling comfortable speaking with your parents is something that almost all young people in your age group have problems with. So don't feel alone in that. Also, think about the fact that they may be concerned with what is going on with you but at the same time they may feel somewhat helpless to be able to respond and assist you, so it might appear that they are shutting down or ignoring you. They don't mean to. I'm sure they love you as deeply as you love them. But in their confusion it is difficult to express to you how they might be able to help you and be there for you at this time.
Remember your friends do mean well for you and are there to support you. While homeschooling can be very rewarding for an individual, and fit the requirements that are needed in someone's situation, it can't replace the face-to-face exposure of people in your same age category. Personally I feel that is where homeschooling falls down. If possible you need as much face-to-face exposure with young people in your same age category so that you can learn more about yourself. Using Skype or FaceTime and also online communication just isn't the same as being in the same room. Not the same energy, not the same back and forth, not the same attention to body language and tone of voice. The combination all helps you as a mammal to learn the subtle nuances of people and society. Like you, I was fairly isolated, but that was mostly of my own choosing. I didn't want to be around people. I am most comfortable on a one-to-one or being alone. And that continues to this day. There's nothing wrong with it but it also hampers my own way of dealing with people, and myself. Does that make sense?
Ginger
Replies to "@greymelody Good morning, Melody. Feeling comfortable speaking with your parents is something that almost all young..."
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@gingerw Good morning, Ginger! I suppose you're right about that. I know that they do love me as much as I love them, I do. They just have difficulties expressing their support and aren't really sure how to go about helping. It probably doesn't help that when I talk about things in-person, face to face, I tend to treat it lightly with smiles and laughter - even if what I'm talking about is something concerning (it's not something I even do purposefully), but it could lead to confusion of them not really being certain if there's an actual issue or not.
Mhm, for sure. I definitely understand what you're saying. While homeschooling is very rewarding for me and I'm really happy with it, it is true that I lack the face-to-face communication most of my peers have. I've balanced this with befriending people online, and I don't think my social skills are bad or anything; if anything, I'd say they're pretty good. I'm really happy with my friends, even though we don't talk IRL, and I wouldn't trade them for the world. They're very supportive, and have been there for me through my tough times. Sure, we can't talk face-to-face, in-person, but our friendship is still just as strong, if that makes sense.
I do think that the concern of learning the subtle nuances of conversation isn't something I struggle with too much, as long as it's a one-on-one conversation (group conversations are overwhelming, both online and IRL). I tend to pick up on a person's mood easily, and I can carry a conversation very well, both in-person and online. I think that as long as I have my online friends, I personally don't have too much of a concern regarding the lack of IRL connections. Due to my dad's work, us staying in the same area is really up in the air and inconsistent, so even if I did make IRL connections, I'm not sure how long they would last before we would possibly have to travel again.
The only concern I really have regarding my friendships is just the age difference -- The age range for the community I tend to hang around are high-school/college age (as that's the type of writing level we're kind of expected to be at; there's a bunch of competitive writing groups in the overall main community) which means they're getting their life together, figuring out what they want to do, their futures, etc. And I'm happy for them, and I hope it all goes well! But I do sometimes worry about being left behind, all things considered.
But yeah, I definitely understand everything you're saying!