I've been diagnosed with fibromyalgia. About 4 years ago things in my life just started falling apart. At the time I'd been married for just a few years (we both had previous marriages and married each other at age 48). We had just moved into a beautiful new home and I found myself in chronic pain with debilitating fatigue. It's been a real adjustment for my husband as I became less and less willing to do the things that used to bring me joy and that we did together. With the diagnosis brought a combinations of medications that ultimately led to a hospitalization caused by serotonin syndrome (although the doctors would never admit that). For the past several years I have been eliminating medications such as neurontin, tramadol, effexor and ambien. Tapering most, went cold turkey on several, with full blown acute withdrawal and/or PAWS. The ups and downs have wreaked havoc on my entire person, self esteem included. I have an understanding husband but at times I'm sure this is not something that he would have chosen for himself to live with. One of the hardest things for me to handle is the guilt over being so needy and wanting understanding. I wouldn't really wish any of this on anybody but at the same time I wish our spouses could really know the pain that chronic illness and its complications can bring on us. Thanks for reading and I hope for shared stories that will help us to feel connected. We are not alone in this, I know.