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John, Volunteer Mentor (@johnbishop)

Stories to lift your spirits

Just Want to Talk | Last Active: Apr 24, 2019 | Replies (70)

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@grandmar

Good Friday All!

My lift-your-spirit story is a love story, but not for cars (sorry John).
If you look at my on-line name, you might be able to guess………..

My hubby and I have know each other since we were young children. I was 9 and he was 13 years old. No, we were NOT boyfriend-girlfriend at that time. We waited until we were older. I was 15 and he was 19. Don't laugh! When you are together that early, you don't wait to get married. In the 70s, if you didn't go to college, there were still good opportunities on the job market. I digress……I was 19 and he was 23 when we married.

We decided from the beginning that we wanted to be 'young' parents and did not want to wait to have children. On our first anniversary, we went away and I was sick as a dog. Found out……you guessed it, I was pregnant with our first child!!!! We had two children, 3 years apart. I won't lie, it was difficult financially as we decided I would be a stay at home mom. It was also difficult for me emotionally because my kids had a couple of issues that led them to hospital visits. I felt isolated because my hubby worked long hours to support us and my friends were in college or just starting their careers. Marriage and kids were far from their minds.

Being young parents did have their benefits. I certainly had the energy needed to raise my family. And, when my friends were getting married and having their family, I had older children that gave us the freedom you don't have when you have infants and young kids. However, if you love having young children, the down side is that it was years and years since I had young children in my home.

By the time I was in my arly 40s, I was hoping my daughter would follow in my footsteps and get married and have babies. I WANTED GRANDCHILDREN!! Of course, it was not realistic. She was in college, then graduate school, then starting her career. And the most important part, she hadn't met her Prince Charming. But I WANTED GRANDCHILDREN!

When my daughter met her Prince Charming and she became Princess Charming, I was thrilled. Not only did her dream come true, but mine would come true, too. I WANTED GRANDCHILDREN. OK, so she didn't marry as young as I did. She was older. But she was now married and I WANTED GRANDCHILDREN. I figured, OK, they will probably wait a bit. If they waited a year, that would mean 9 months later i would have my first grandchild. Little did I think they would wait and 'do things you can't do when you have kids." But I WANTED GRANDCHILDREN!

My second chance came when my son met and married his love. A beautiful wedding, a great place to live, already involved in their careers. I WANTED GRANDCHILDREN!!! One year passes and no grands. Neither child was giving me the one thing I wanted more than anything. I WANTED A GRANDCHILD! I had to settle for grandpups (3 of them), celebrate the birth of grandchildren for others and give my grandchildren affection to any cute puppy I saw. Then it happened, I WAS GOING TO BE A GRANDMA! Sadly, the pregnancy ended with a miscarriage. Two more followed. My heart was broken for my children.

All was not lost. My daughter was pregnant, again. This time, all went well! She actually wanted me in the delivery room at the birth of my first grandchild! It was amazing to be there and not be the one who had to work for the end prize. I WAS A GRANDMA! My granddaughter took her time to be born, but she was worth it. She was beautiful and it was LOVE AT FIRST SIGHT. I hadn't felt that was since the birth of my own children.

I was still working, my hubby wasn't. He had the opportunity to go over to see our granddaughter whenever he wanted. For me, every Friday, right after work, we'd go over to HER! Saturday and Sunday mornings, we'd go see our girl! Then it happened…our daughter went back to work. Guess who got to babysit every Wednesday while I went to work…..you guessed right! My husband spent every Wednesday with our precious baby while I went to work. Not fair! I WANTED TO BE A GRANDMA!! However, there was nothing much I could do about that other than to enjoy her when I could.

Then it happened, my son and daugher-in-law were pregnant. We found out in the most delightful way. We were at our son's house when I received a text. The text was a picture of a stick from a pregnancy test. It was POSITIVE!!! I was going TO BE A GRANDMA, AGAIN!!! Doing the math meant that these two babies would be 5 months apart. And sure enough, 5 months, almost to the day, my second granddaughter was born. Although I was not in the delivery room this time, I got to give her her first bath since her birth! I found a new career. I wanted to be the person to give a newborn their first bath. What a joy!!!! I AM A GRANDMA OF TWO BEAUTIFUL GRANDDAUGHTERS!

Now, I divided my time between both. Friday nights and Sundays at my daughter and Saturdays at my son's house. I was in heaven. Then it happened, my daughter-in-law went back to work. My hubby got to babysit our newest granddaughter one day a week. He now had our granddaughters to himself twice a week, while I WORKED!!! Boooooo! To make myself feel a little better, I would shop for these lovelies. I shpped for them as if they were twins, cousin-twins! What fun! I actually still do it even thought they are now 7-1/2 and 8 years old.

But my story is not over. About the time my younger granddaughter turned 1-1/2 years old, guess what……my daughter-in-law was pregnant, again! She was an only child and did not want it for her daughter. I WAS GOING TO BE A GRANDMA, AGAIN! It was just as exciting as the first time! My daughter felt she was too old to have another and she feared going through what she went through the first time. I knew in my heart that this would probably be my last grand. Soon it happened, I BECAME A GRANDMA, again. This time……it was a boy!!! I had a little boy as sweet my little boy!

I AM A GRATEFUL, DOTING, LOVING GRANDMA TO THREE BEAUTIFUL, SMART AND LOVING GRANDCHILDREN!

Sadly, I don't get to see my younger two grands very often. They live too far to hop in the car to drive. My health issues have also made trips to see and stay with them difficult. My older grand lives down the block and I have the honor of watching her grow.

Regardless of how often I see them in person, my grands ase ALWAYS with me. They are the BIGGEST PART OF MY HEAR AND SOUL! I adore them!

I AM A GRANDMA!!!!

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Replies to "Good Friday All! My lift-your-spirit story is a love story, but not for cars (sorry John)...."

@grandmar no need to be sorry – real love triumphs and that’s what your story is about 🙂

@grandmar
What a sweet story, Ronnie! You are quite the storyteller.

@lioness That's how I became a grandma My son and d I l waited 7 years Everytime I flu out to Pasadena I asked them they said someday we'll 7 yrs later I had my grandson .I moved out here ,so glad I did I get to see him make his own path now in life The drum solo he just did he drummed to the right beat Possible new school next year middle school ,sailing lessons ,my son just told me he will be enrolled this summer in school of rock learning to play with others now Being a grandma is the greatest

@grandmar I get the feeling you wanted to be a grandmother. 😉
I am way too old to not have grandchildren. My children were late bloomers when it came/comes to getting married. My daughter got married in November, 2017 at the age of 35 and I don't think she will have children. My son is getting married in August at the age of 38 (a week before he turns 39). I know his fiancee is dying to have children so I think it won't be too much longer. Unfortunately, they live in Denver so I won't get to see the grands as much as I would like, it will be bittersweet when they have children. I'm hoping my daughter will end up having children too, but if so she had better hurry, although I was born when my mother was 40. I am just afraid that if she doesn't have children she will regret it at some time. She loves children and is great with them. If she has children she will probably be living in Philadelphia at that point. She and her husband share addresses in NYC and Philadelphia due to work but at some point they will need to consolidate.
JK

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