Hello Sophie, I've read these other responses. I think you probably do have a form of hyperacusis and that you would benefit from having your audiologist turn down the sound on your hearing aids, especially the high frequencies. Then augment what you hear in these lower settings with captioning apps. You will need a smart phone for this, but I think most people with serious hearing loss realize that a smart phone is well worth the price because of the great hearing apps. If you have an iphone, you can augment your comprehension during in-person conversations with captions provided by Otter ai. I use this constantly, especially now when everyone is wearing masks. I also use it for any online meeting that is not captioned. I just set the phone up on my laptop with Otter ai picking up the sound. The captions are clear and generally, but not always, accurate. If you have an Android phone, you would use Google Live Transcribe, which is very similar. For making and receiving phone calls you can download Innocaption+ which live captions every call you make or receive and captions voice mail as well. The captioners are generally humans, though occasionally in peak periods they switch over to automatic speech recognition, which is okay but not as good.
I was a technophobe but Otter and Innocaption have saved my life.
One other point, you mention that the hearing aids become physically uncomfortable. I've experienced this. Sometimes the shape of the ear changes, if you gain or lose weight, or even with climate changes. Your audiologist should be able to adjust your ear mold so that it's more comfortable.
Good luck!