1. < Cancer: Managing Symptoms

Facing Cancer Recurrence, PTSD & Acknowledging Mental Health

Posted by Merry, Alumni Mentor @merpreb, Dec 6, 2018

It's extremely difficult to face the fact of recurring cancers. After treatments we try and get away from it all and live our life. Then along comes another CT scan or PET scan and POW, you have to face another cancer. My reaction was developing PTSD.

You can read what I wrote in my blog: https://my20yearscancer.com/blog/
How do we cope? How do we react? What do we do?
How have you all reacted to another cancer? Or the possibility of another one? Has your "already compromised" mental health been able to deal with it? How? Or not?

Interested in more discussions like this? Go to the Cancer: Managing Symptoms Support Group.

janlanderz | @janlanderz | Sep 1, 2019
In reply to @becsbuddy "@janlanderz Hi, again. You mentioned not telling your Mom of your diagnosis because of her age,..." + (show)
@becsbuddy

@janlanderz Hi, again. You mentioned not telling your Mom of your diagnosis because of her age, etc. I, too, didn’t tell my mother when I was diagnosed with a brain lesion due to a rare autoimmune disease. But, it turned out that she knew from the beginning. It was so hard to pretend that all was well when it wasn’t. Now, she is a good support to me. She’s 96 and healthier than I am!
I hope all goes well and you can make your trip to the east coast. Please take care

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thank you becky... you are too cute... glad your mom is doing so well... and I do think she knows there is something wrong.. I told her I quit smoking in Dec.. she is real glad to hear that... but I think she knows something is wrong.. but I still rather not tell her the worst.. did tell her a while back they were checking a lump on my throat..

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janlanderz | @janlanderz | Sep 1, 2019
In reply to @gingerw "I am so impressed to read what everyone is saying! @janlanderz Your strength is awesome, and..." + (show)
@gingerw

I am so impressed to read what everyone is saying!
@janlanderz Your strength is awesome, and your wisdom to downplay your issues with your mom is commendable. Remember, you are her daughter, and she may be aware something is not right. Perhaps saying there are some health issues, but not many details, will be enough?
@auntieoakley I like the sounds of your group!
@alamogal35 You have my prayers
@merpreb It's scary times, but no doubt you will handle things with grace and attitude ;))
Having a group like Connect here to lean on is a good thing!
Ginger

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thanks everyone for your input.. I am so glad to be part of this group.. the support is overwhelming... and sacred...

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kittykiernan | @kittykiernan | Sep 2, 2019

Hi everyone I have chronic Epstein barre , it causing cancer. I can not move my neck and had white things in my mouth for a month, no one helps me. God forbid I can find a oncologists or beg someone to do a peta scan. I have had who
It’s patches down my esophagus for a moth

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1 reply
Merry, Alumni Mentor | @merpreb | Sep 2, 2019
In reply to @jshdma "@alamogal635 @merpreb Just reading these stories is terrifying. No wonder you are afraid. And yes, the..." + (show)
@jshdma

@alamogal635 @merpreb Just reading these stories is terrifying. No wonder you are afraid. And yes, the unknown makes everything worse. I wish AA stood for "anxiety anonymous," but unfortunately it's not that simple.

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@jshdma- Now there's a thought! Maybe we could come up with a better acronym and start a whole new "thing". What are your thoughts? Any ideas?

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1 reply
Merry, Alumni Mentor | @merpreb | Sep 2, 2019
In reply to @becsbuddy "@janlanderz Hi, again. You mentioned not telling your Mom of your diagnosis because of her age,..." + (show)
@becsbuddy

@janlanderz Hi, again. You mentioned not telling your Mom of your diagnosis because of her age, etc. I, too, didn’t tell my mother when I was diagnosed with a brain lesion due to a rare autoimmune disease. But, it turned out that she knew from the beginning. It was so hard to pretend that all was well when it wasn’t. Now, she is a good support to me. She’s 96 and healthier than I am!
I hope all goes well and you can make your trip to the east coast. Please take care

Jump to this post

@becsbuddy- I agree with you about telling @janlanderz's mom. Having cancer is stress enough but not telling your mom about your illness ads to that. I'm sure that you have felt that. Also I'm sure that your mom knows that something is up because you have cancelled your trips to see her. It sounds like she has brought you up to be a caring loving person, so giver her the benefit of the doubt that she will help you and that it will not hurt her. Will you give this some thought?

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1 reply
Merry, Alumni Mentor | @merpreb | Sep 2, 2019
In reply to @alamogal635 "@merpreb What a fantastic attitude you have. Gosh, you are a true trooper and have been..." + (show)
@alamogal635

@merpreb What a fantastic attitude you have. Gosh, you are a true trooper and have been through so much and are going through so much. Will have to think up a mantra, but that's a great idea. What is SBRT? That is another new term for me. Gosh, I am not great at prayer--sometimes nothing comes, but I figure the intention is acknowledged. I am better today--the closer it gets. As you say it is getting to be where the results will be known and shared.. Was going to say that cancer is a sneaky and nasty disease to have, but so are so many others. Yes, it does make us turn inward. The thought of something growing within that has no place there actually makes me angry. This is a great place to come and "vent" with others who are sharing in something that others cannot relate to fully. Anyway, thank you for your kind words and for being here as moderators. Your knowledge is wonderful as is your support. I hold you in awe for lending such support with all you have going on in your life and with your health.

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Good morning @alamogal635 - Thank you for your kind words. As a Mentor it's been truly an honor to share my experience and knowledge so that I can hopefully make it easier for others. And you have not been a wall flower on here either! You have extended your self in a truly heroic measure so soon after your operation! I think that reaching out to people who truly understand your feelings is so important and healing! Thank you for all your help too! What will you be doing today? Are you in the path of the hurricane?

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Merry, Alumni Mentor | @merpreb | Sep 2, 2019
In reply to @richcolleen "Just had my scan at the Mayo Clinic was also nervous (my cancer is terminal) as..." + (show)
@richcolleen

Just had my scan at the Mayo Clinic was also nervous (my cancer is terminal) as I had different feelings within lung and stomach. Of course one always thinks the worst. Turned out everything was same.my scan was read and meet with Dr same day which helped me. Tumor stayed the same as did the nodules.get sick 8-10 days after treatments, which I get every 21 days, so I took holiday and skipping the next 21 days. Hoping I made good decision but my mind was tired of being sick. Prayers coming your way.

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@richcolleen- I think that we have to decide for ourselves how much we can take before we step back and say, "hey now, that's enough for now". The night of my last chemo session my husband almost called an ambulance. If I had more scheduled I don't think that I would have been able to do it. Heal well, rest a lot and hopefully you will bounce back soon. What will you do other while you heal?

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janlanderz | @janlanderz | Sep 2, 2019
In reply to @merpreb "@becsbuddy- I agree with you about telling @janlanderz's mom. Having cancer is stress enough but not..." + (show)
@merpreb

@becsbuddy- I agree with you about telling @janlanderz's mom. Having cancer is stress enough but not telling your mom about your illness ads to that. I'm sure that you have felt that. Also I'm sure that your mom knows that something is up because you have cancelled your trips to see her. It sounds like she has brought you up to be a caring loving person, so giver her the benefit of the doubt that she will help you and that it will not hurt her. Will you give this some thought?

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@merpreb ... My mom worries when her sister gets a cold... and it stresses her out to the point that is all she can talk about. She lives alone and has already had a heart attack so I rather be safe than sorry.. If things ever get bad where my life is in jeopardy or coming to an end, then I will probably tell her... I plan on maybe moving back to the east coast and would maybe tell her if I was near her, where she could see me physically and see that I look the same and am doing fine with the chemo I am currently receiving. It is a choice me and my sisters made, and they are near her, so they know how she is a worry wart.. but thanks for your input

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Merry, Alumni Mentor | @merpreb | Sep 2, 2019

@janlanderz- I understand. I think that we all just wanted help, but given that your mom is an extreme worrier I think that you made the right choice. How are you feeling today? A bit better?

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richcolleen | @richcolleen | Sep 2, 2019

Build up strength and play cards, mahjong and work in my perineal garden and go to daily mass when I can.

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