Thank you for your wise words. I think you are right. I will be talking by phone to my counselor today and look forward to "pouring my heart out." What you say makes sense. On top fo everything else, I have depression and take prozac for it. I guess it helps, but like you say this lobectomy is not a "normal" occurrence. It is early in the recovery time. Sorry you spilled coffee on your lap top. You wrote well despite it. Again, what you've written has really helped. Blessings to you and I will be reading a lot of these posts. Don't write as much as others right now. This however is a great site. I wish everyone all the good ness that we can glean from the others here.