Connect
← Return to Reunion With Brother After Years (Severe Anxiety)
Discussion
Reunion With Brother After Years (Severe Anxiety)
Depression & Anxiety | Last Active: Jan 16, 2019 | Replies (50)Comment receiving replies
Thanks @ainsleigh
I just feel so emotionally devastated. I've been so angry for the past few weeks and almost resorted to self harming again. I went and bought razor blades and sat there for a good hour wanting to do it but I didn't.
Christmas has never been a good time for me since my Ma's death and I fooled myself into thinking that this year would make up for all the ones that were terrible. Who was I kidding?
Dr. Naughton is back tomorrow so I'm going to go to her to get more sleeping pills and possibly some Diazepam to stop all the racing thoughts that going over and over in my head.
Replies to "Thanks @ainsleigh I just feel so emotionally devastated. I've been so angry for the past few..."
@yangedd Those racing thoughts are awful. Just want them to stop and cannot seem to get them to stop. No rest or sleep in this state. Try not to punish yourself and hope the doctor can help. Racing thoughts are dreadfully painful.
Connect
Hi, @yangedd - I am so sorry to hear that things did not go to plan and that you didn't come face to face in a reunion with your brother. I can imagine that would indeed feel devastating. From what you said before it sounded like you had been filled with hope about this relationship and the reunion. It's completely okay that you were not in a place to interact with anyone before. Good to hear from you now, though.
Spending a holiday alone is really hard.
I'm glad your medical team has been with you through this and that you are going back for another visit.
Another discussion you might be interested in looking at and participating on Connect is this one on self harm https://connect.mayoclinic.org/discussion/selfharm.
You mentioned being isolated at the moment. You'd also talked about your partner at one time, and your friend Freda. Are either of them or someone else available at this time to help you walk through this?