It's everything really that's sending my tail spinning. How do I greet him? What will we talk about? How will I react to meeting his son for the first time? Will we be able to reconnect after years apart? I actually rang a support line and broke down into tears as I discussed everything with one of the support volunteers. It's three weeks to Christmas and I feel (I apologise for saying this) emotionally destroyed thinking about my Mum and my Dad in a care home in Waterford following a stroke due to severe alcohol withdrawal in 2011. It should be a happy time for me, yet I'm filled with emotional upheaval and anxiety ridden. I'm so sorry to be withering on.