@ginaquilts I do care because it seems that the problem is the HMO. Do other people you work with have problems with them insisting on food you hate? When I get upset, I put on some soothing music and sit down and make a list of what is important. Living every day to its fullest is important. So, when I was diagnosed with Diabetes, I was furious. I lost perspective and all but refused to do what I was told I had to do. I finally decided to control what happened to me. I knew nothing of Diabetes so I had to depend on research, reading, and my endocrinologist, and Mayo Connect (once I found it). Slowly, I came to accept the changes I had to make. I care too much for people in my life and things I want to do to give up. Maybe you could evaluate what is going on and see if you really don't care. Is there a change you would like to make? A different job? Is there someone who is objective that could talk this out with you? I don't know what your career is, but surely there are other places that wouldn't be so controlling. You could get away from an HMO and have the same doctor who would spend time and work with you. Is any of this a possibility?
Carol