@jgl15, hang in there darlin'. Back in the 90's I had a very good shrink who said she couldn't figure out if I had Bi Polar Disorder or ADHD. And she was very good. As it turned out, I was on the Autism Spectrum, had ADHD, and was depressed because my orher two issues went untreated.

Everything will get sorted out in its own way. You sound like a super sweet person who cares enough about your self and others to give it your all. Have that cup of tea or coffee now. You are making progress. You did it! Hope I get the chance to talk to you again soon!