@woogie @mattie @tens4u5125 @lolaemma @junkartist @pjss48. And many others.

It's late, and I'm tired, and as always, I'm in pain. So, I'll just write a little, enough to start getting acquainted.

I'm turning 70 next week. My wife and I have been married for 48 years, and we have a son and a daughter. Our son and his wife have 1 daughter who started 2nd grade today. Our daughter and her husband have 2 girls, one is 3, and the other just had her first birthday.

I was in the ministry, straight out of Bible College in 1972, newlyweds with the hope for a bright future. I'll skip the details of our next 30+ years, to around 2000. I was the pastor of a church in a town of 247 residents, enjoying the work and involved in community affairs. But, in spite of my enjoyment and satisfaction with my job, I was becoming depressed, maybe in part from burn out. I couldn't put my finger on what triggered my downward spiral. I started taking antidepressants in 2003, but they didn't slow the depression down. I made several suicide attempts, and self admitted to a suicide recovery facility, which was a very nice place. The usual stay is 3 days. I stayed for 6 weeks, because I knew that I wasn't ready to rejoin the world and stay alive.

I retired at 55, because I was totally unable to function. I received Social Security disability, and we moved to a home we had bought 2 years earlier. We live in the country, and the covid19 restrictions have affected us very little. It was hard to miss church for 13 weeks, but my wife and I are happy to be home. There's so much work to be done in the yard and on the house and barn and shop that we don't really mind being home and having time to do everything. I always thought that retirement meant travel and rest. Reality turns out to be quite different.

I know about dealing with having too much stuff. We both enjoy collecting collections. We are familiar faces at the thrift stores around central Oregon, where we live.

The first psychiatrist I had diagnosed me with major depression (no surprise there), anxiety disorder, OCD and PTSD. I tried lots of antidepressants, and landed on Wellbutrin for depression and Klonopin for anxiety. I've been taking them since January of 2006, adding others along the way. In 2013, I started being treated for peripheral neuropathy. It began with numbness and tingling in my feet, and progressed to more and more pain. By now, it's 6-7 during the day and 8-9 when I sit down or lie down. Having that much pain all the time makes depression worse.

So, that's where I am today. I see a therapist weekly and have some good doctors. I take quite a few medications for one thing or another. Without morphine I don't know how I could keep going. And with a supportive wife, a faithful service dog, and a strong faith in God, I do life a day at a time.

I told you I'd try to keep it short. Sorry for not keeping my promise. I look forward to getting to know all of you.

Jim