← Return to Caregiver for spouse with MCI (Mild cognitive impairment)

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@IndianaScott @birdhouseclosed my situation is different in that I am carrying for my spouse that needs a transplant. The one thing that is similar is that he has some cognitive issues, so his decision making isn't always the best. He is the one that pays the bills but he struggles with it now, so I have to help. We've got the paperwork for an advanced directive sitting on our coffee table and we both agree it needs to be done, but like you said, it's a hard discussion, so we keep putting it off. His one year work-up is in a few weeks, so I would like to have it done before we go for it.

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Replies to "@IndianaScott @birdhouseclosed my situation is different in that I am carrying for my spouse that needs..."

You are correct in getting all the legal paperwork in order. We did that right away as he was as anxious as I was to get it done before it was an issue. As far as Bill paying goes we put all we could on auto pay or reminders on the computers,this did relieve the problem somewhat. I always liked to say ""one day at a time", now I am trying to live that way. Warm wishes to all.

Good morning @jodeej I sympathize with your having the paperwork out on the table! I kept ours taped to the fridge for awhile! In our case it was a tangential discussion, which got my wife to get this all done.

There was a family disagreement regarding what different people wanted done with my father's ashes. My mom wanted one thing while my sisters wanted something different. My mom asked me to 'broker' the deal and get her wishes followed. It was much more difficult than if it had been in writing ahead of time. My wife decided she never wanted anything like this to happen so she decided to act on the whole bunch of difficult end of life issues. She even went so far as to design her own 'Celebration of Life', its music, eulogists, who she wanted to be invited, and even what wine she wanted us to serve.

It made an incredibly sad time when she passed away a bit less devastating by not having to deal with any questions as to 'what would Mom want', because she told us and we had it all in writing!

Strength, courage, and peace!

@IndianaScott this is definitely food for thought. I think we will have to sit down and have a good talk this weekend. Thank you.

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