← Return to Caregiver for spouse with MCI (Mild cognitive impairment)

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@birdhouseclosed

You must have untold strength. It has been 3 years of dealing with this. Yes you are correct MCI is as you assumed. I find that taking over his role as far as finances and important decisions go is challenging as he was always my ROCk an could always count on his decisions and help. I am dealing with depression and anxiety, but I can't find a way out as of yet. I am under treatment but find I cannot talk to him about how I feel which would make him feel irresponsible. I would appreciate any insight anyone could give.

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Replies to "You must have untold strength. It has been 3 years of dealing with this. Yes you..."

Hi there, I was diagnosed almostt two years ago with MCI at the age of 64, a week later I had a heart attack from the stress that such news caused. I survived the heart attack, but have been left with anxiety issues. Now, I am a retired RN who worked many times in my career with Dementia patients. My father died at 78 from it and his side of family have strong dementia history. I’ll tell you from my side what helps me best even though I have a wonderful support systems comprised of my husband and two daughters. Patience, lots of patience, understand that when we say or do things many times we can’t control what we think or comes out of our mouths. I have lots of “cognitive reserve” so most people don’t realize that I have a problem when they see me for short time or meet me for the first time. However, my husband, has to deal with me everyday and can tell the difference. There are times when I don’t like myself for,what I say or how I act with him, I know I hurt his feelings; it is hard, wry hard, but rember that it is even harder for us. I was strong, type A personality, ran the household as long así we’ve been married,and now I rely on him for a lot. I am scared to death for not knowing what kind of person I am going’s to turn into. Whether this loving man that has been with me for 40+ years will stop loving or liking me. I have MCI, plus strong family history, plus I am positive for APOE4 and MTHFR so my deck is very negatively stacked for Dementia in the near future. Remember that MCI is not Dementia yet, and that about 30% of people afflicted don’t necessarily crossover to Dementia. I see a therapist and take antianxierty medication, no other meds since the available dementia meds don’t help. Also attend an early stage Alz and MCI support group once a month, read as much as possible about Dementia, do brain games, try to see friends once a week, although there are days when I don’t want to do anything or go anywhere, when I am very anxious and scared to even accompany my husband to the grocery store. My husband has a breakfast group once a week and he goes to gym 3 times a week. That helps him some. Social interaction and time out for you is as important as social interaction for your husband. I am very grateful for my husband, at this point I don’t need much “caring”, but I am very grateful to have him because the future is grim. Hang in there, love him, don’t take it personal when things happen, he is still there, but love yourself as well.