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@@@ Hello All,
I am doing well all considering. The head shudders from the detox of effexor are off the hook today. I am down to 25 daily. I cut in half and try to make it on 12.5. Struggling today. Been walking 2 to 4 miles daily. That usually helps with the depression for a while but it usually returns. Also continuing the MCT oil. On the fence whether it helps or not? In a nut shell, I am depressed and struggling not to be. I am not sure what I am supposed to do? I need to sell my house and move where I don't feel threatened. I can not live there if BF is around. I don't trust him or any intentions he may have. I am still convinced he is a psycho with harmful tendencies. He has so much anger bottled up inside him it is scary. I feel for anyone he gets involved with. I do know he wouldn't physically harm his children.He did find out that His ex wife( well not ex they have been seperated for 4 years now), has been abusing the middle daughter. She is seeking help at school with a counselor. Its hard not to listen when he wants to talk, we were friends for a very long time. I know I need to cut ties totally but the youngest daughter who lived with me stays in touch. She is very sweet and so innocent. I can't turn my back on her. She is an innocent child. It is very painful though as the tears roll down as I type. Why does life have to be so difficult?
On a positive note I am spending a lot more time with my 3 year old granddaughter. She soothes my heart and soul. Such a sweet little munchkin. Love her to pieces. Thats about it for now Thanks for your thoughts. I am hanging in there. I will make it through this also.
As always, pouring my thoughts to all of you is so helpful. Thanks for listening.
Replies to "@@@ Hello All, I am doing well all considering. The head shudders from the detox of..."
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Hey, @mjsmimi , how are you doing this afternoon? I am so proud of you for walking! That is one of the best things we can ever do for ourselves! Sounds like .maybe a little bit of sress has been taken off your shoulders. For that, I am very grateful.
Also, I am so encouraged that you have set boundaries for yourself. When we come to realize that we are not safe where we are, and decide to do something about it, well, that just takes strength. And courage. You are very brave for taking the steps you have already taken.
Your love and affection for those children tell me what a kind heart you have. You deserve to be safe as much as they do.
My hope is that you continue this plan of action, and that you will concentrate on first things first. The depression worries me, because I am not quite sure why you are weaning off the medication for it. I must have missed something somewhere.
I hope that you have a good doctor who is advising you on this. Sometimes it takes a while to determine what route to take, with depression. I have dealt with it almost all of my life. Will you be taking a different antidepressant when you are totally off the present one? For me, an antidepressant is as necessary as insulin is for a diabetic. I personally have tried just about every approach there is. I just get worse and worse, without those chemicals my body does not seem to make on its own.
Everyone is different. What works for one doesn't always work the same way for others. And if I have said too much, please know you don't have to answer anything I asked!
I just want you to know I am here for you in my little corner of the world. You are doing great! I will be sending all my positive energies and thoughts, prayers and hugs, your way! Talk to you soon!
Mamacita (Jane)