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@parus
I'm so happy that you are going to give therapy a try despite your fears. Is this person a new therapist for you? If so, how did you locate the new therapist? My last therapist was the one I had after a long time of fear about seeing a therapist due to my mistreatment by one I completely trusted. I saw her for several years and learned a great deal of good things from her. But at a point where my husband and I were getting divorced, she crossed the line. I was extremely vulnerable and she said I could live with her for awhile. That was a huge mistake for her and devastating for me. She ended up threatening me with a lawsuit for $$ she said I "owed" for her "help." The change in her and her viciousness shocked me and shook my world to the core. I had totally believed in her and had accepted her "kindness" during a very bad time in my life. I nearly succumbed to a breakdown, but was determined not to let her control my life. I moved to California shortly after theses incidents (9 months), and began living again. I still felt paranoid and questioned my own judgement constantly. I didn't trust anyone in the mental health community at that time. It was the most frightening thing I've ever experienced.
About 5 years later, I was at a wedding in Marin County, California, and friends of the couple stood up one at a time and talked about their love for different aspects of their relationships with the couple. The man who participated in the wedding along with the priest, sat with me at the reception and as we talked, he revealed that he was a therapist, and he gave me a signed copy of a book he had written. I read the book, and there began wonderful therapy work and eventually my becoming a Support Group Network Full Facilitator after 7 years of working and training. I am so thankful that I didn't give up completely on talk therapy and support groups!
By the way, I found out from a friend that the unscrupulous therapist in Tucson was sued for malpractice by three of her former patients and lost her license a few years after my experience with her. I was too intimidated and messed up by her to sue her at the time. Plus, I thought it was MY fault that she was angry (PTSD kicked in).
I hope you find an excellent therapist who can help you regain some equilibrium in your life and emotions. You deserve to be loved and happy Parus. I'm holding you in my mind and heart as being healthy, happy and at peace.
Gail
Volunteer Mentor
Replies to "@parus I'm so happy that you are going to give therapy a try despite your fears...."
Such a good observation, @contentandwell. Gail, @gailb gives a wonderful example of "keeping-on" and not stopping until you find the answers. Some problems are not easy to solve but there is usually an answer is we persist and don't give in to discouragement!
Teresa
@contentandwell
Thank you for your comments. Yes, it was horrible and my self confidence was already shakey. It took many years for me to trust my judgement again. But, it was a valuable experience because I eventually learned not to trust another person more than I trust myself. I learned how to listen to and heed my intuition when it speaks to me. I had a feeling that I shouldn't move to live with my old therapist, but I ignored my intuition. When I looked back I realized that every time I ignored my intuition, I ran into a problem later. Needless to say, I listen to others ideas and opinions now, and then I check those with my intuition. If they differ, I choose my intuition. A hard lesson to learn for me.
I appreciate your understanding.
Gail
Volunteer Mentor
My husband and I have traveled the US widely. We often go to places that could be dangerous if we hadn’t prepared. I’ve noticed lately that park rangers are talking about self recovery, the notion that by preparing, a person can rescue themselves. That brought me to think about my friends and the people here who suffer from anxiety and panic attacks. I realize that these problems are multifaceted and I have suffered from this myself. But as one prong of the solution, I’m wondering if it would help to understand what happens in the body when we have a panic attack. I have learned some about the physiology of anxiety by reading books. One of the best books I have read is entitled The Body Keeps Score. When I have a panic attack, I recruit my parasympathetic nervous system by engaging in mental imagery. My goal is to rely on myself for taming the attacks. This is just part of the solution for me. Medication, exercise , good nutrition and a strong social network also work for me. My best thoughts and wishes to those who suffer these attacks. I’m sorry this is so long but I hope it helps someone.
@mpeters What a wonderful plan! I am so impressed that you have researched this and have a plan for your body to begin the healing process. Thank you for sharing this with us (and also the book, The Body Keeps Score). Teresa
@gailb I think many of us have been through some degree of self-doubt from lack of self-confidence. I feel so much more secure at my age than I did when I was younger. I am who I am, take me or leave me, and I will decide what is best for me, more these days than earlier in my life.
JK
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@gailb what a horrible experience for you. I think many things like this can really shake our confidence in ourselves about decisions. I’m so glad that you found a good therapist and things are much better now.
JK