@parus Thank you. I too wish there was a switch in your head that would change your experiences and panic. I have read your posts and have a sense of the pain and helplessness you feel at times. At one time in my life I just wanted to lay down and never get up again so I could be free of my burdens. Shortly after that I decided to go to counseling and ended up in a group therapy session. My talk therapy continued for over 30 years and helped me beyond measure.

As I said though, I had to add the antidepressant and prior to that, an occasional Lorazepam to make it to where I am today. I wish I had a magic wand for you, but for me it took lots of hard work and willingness to face my fears about the worst that could be in me. What I found was a frightened, lovely, innocent child inside who only wanted love and acceptance. I learned to give all my selves at different ages the love and acceptance I longed for.

There is hope as more is learned about the brain, sometimes disproving theories that have been held for decades. New Mental health discoveries about addition, anxiety and depression: New research finds that the hippocampus may yield important clues for a range of mental health illnesses including addiction, anxiety and depression.

The hippocampus is an area of the brain commonly linked with memory and dementia.

But new U of T Scarborough research finds that it may also yield important clues about a range of mental health illnesses including addiction, anxiety and depression.

The research, authored by a team of neuroscientists, found that a specific part of the hippocampus could play an important role in emotional regulation, a finding that calls into question our understanding of how exactly this part of the brain works.

Read more: https://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2018/04/180414171606.htm

@gailb Thank you for asking. Things are improving. My thyroid had bottomed out and now the TSH is in the normal range again. Going for botox injections in jaws to help w/ grinding and clenching from TMJnin hopes it will help w/ head/neck/shoulder pain.
The sun has been shining and there is once again hope on the horizon.

@parus

Thanks for the update. I'm so happy that you're doing better and things are looking up for you. It's amazing how much thyroid hormones can affect everything in our lives. I was awaking in a puddle of water every morning, and sweating profusely everytime I ate & I kept telling my internist about it but he didn't think it was a problem. The internist finally referred me to my endocrinologist for my diabetes. The Endo checked my thyroid hormones and found that I was taking too much. He told me that's why I was sweating all the time. After a couple of weeks taking less I was no longer sweating and my mood was much improved. Thankfully I was only overdosing for about a year. My diabetes is better under the endocrinologist too.

I'm glad you see hope on the horizon and that the sun is shining where you are! My son has has Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD). He uses a "light box" to help. If you haven't been evaluated or used light therapy before, you may want to check into that for the winter months.