Allow me to share my experience to, I hope, alleviate some of your very reasonable concerns.
At age 71 ( healthy and in good condition), an echo identified a 49mm dilated aortic root. After doing a lot of due diligence, I decided on surgery. The surgery entailed radical thoracic resection, a reconstruction of the aortic valve, and a radical graft of the ascending aorta up to the aortic arch. While “under the hood” my surgeon also performed a maze ablation. My aorta diameter turned out to be an actual 55mm. I was on bypass for almost 8 hours. I spent 4 days in cardio ICU and 1 day and overnight on a ward. I started taking short walks the day after I returned home and, despite a few “kerfufels” was pretty much recovered in 30 days. I am now approaching 75 years old and doing well. So, my advice is that if you need the surgery ( a BAV and your current diameter seems to indicate) don’t let the seriousness deter you. Get a good surgeon and a top notch hospital ( I think the latter is more important than the former) and go for it.. It is not a “stroll in the park” but it’s not as bad as you fear. You can do it. Good luck and God Bless.