@annedodrill44

We are the same age, so I recognize the thoughts of our own deaths. I also found that embracing those thoughts and other feelings of fear helps to dissipate the anxiety. Acceptance of the finite reality of life takes time and patience. In my case, I had the "good luck" of having a near death experience after a car accident when I was 35 years old. While it was a terrible accident and I had to be cut out of the car with the jaws of life, I learned from it. I am pretty sure I died briefly and then had one of those experiences others talk about. One moment I was here and the next I wasn't. I didn't know I "wasn't" until later. I wasn't afraid, nor did I physically feel anything. What I "remember" is floating in a "waiting" state, looking forward seeing a bright light seeping around a dark round door. I was waiting to be let through the door. Instead, I began hearing a voice saying, "lady, are you Ok?" It was repeated several times, becoming louder each time, then I opened my eyes. I was quite injured, and in great pain when I became conscious.

After my experience, I no longer have a fear of dying. I wasn't ready to go when I was young, but even then I didn't fear it. I still don't fear death. I'm not religious in any way, so that helps me accept death as part of life, without judgement. I know my body is wearing down and not reproducing cells the way it did when I was young, and I can accept this slow deterioration process. Someone once told me, we've been getting older since the day we were born, and that helped me to better accept aging. In fact, I am more fearful of my husband dying before me and continuing to live without my best friend, love, and lifetime companion. I will deal with that when the time comes. I live my life with conviction, action, and kindness. I hope I leave the earth and my family and friends in a better place for having known me.

I hope my experience with near death is helpful for all who read it here. This didn't stop my panic attacks though. I only stopped having them after I started taking Citalopram when I was 63 years old. I no longer have panic, which I now believe was a function of the wrong brain chemistry. I was in talk therapy for over 20 years, and although I learned A LOT through that, I was never able to get rid of the panic attacks. Embracing them at the time, was the only thing that helped dissipate the feelings. I'm hoping that you find peace and relief for your anxiety and panic in whatever way works best for you. Gentle hugs for you.

Jump to this post