Good morning- I also have been depressed and angry on and off for years but very severely for the past 4 or 5 years. I am 71 years old and have been in and out of therapy. I have been diagnosed with PTSD due to my 20+ years of lung cancer and childhood anxiety. Last year I stopped seeing a therapist who turned out to be sicker than I was. She was so depressing! After last year's 4th lung cancer I decided that I would not fall into a deep depression again. I was so fearful of this. I began a blog about my journey https://my20yearscancer.com/. My PCP helped me with a medication that supplemented anti-depressants that I was taking, Wellbutrin. I am not interested in ever getting off these pills that have helped me. They are not 100% successful all the time and I have to fight to help them work. It's now 6 months since my last treatment and I have more tests to go through. That always sets me back, esp with anxiety. I have also begun to exercise, and that helps incredibly well. It's the thought of doing something good for me that makes me feel good, that I actually did something.
I wish you well. I hope that this thread continues because I think that this beats most illnesses as far as debilitation go. It's an all encompassing cloud that just wont go away, or at least in the background, always threatening to rain. I hate it. I know that we all do. I think that it's part genetic too.