@gratia I recognize that you are probably much younger than I am - with so much responsibility caring for your mother. I think being younger, makes the acceptance and adaptability a little harder. All your dreams just go out the door with this disease, painful at best, and harder for the younger person that has a full life to live and doesn't want to be tied down. I can only tell you, try to find the hopeful silver lining, in all of this. Your mom won't be here forever, and then you'll be able to move forward, enjoy living, and know that you took the best care for her you could. You gave her life, even though her faculties had diminished. Get help, you don't and shouldn't do this alone. Reach out to as many people as you can to preserve your own sanity. Accept whatever help you get. Your mother will be fine, with more people assisting her, and you'll be able to breathe, and not feel so contained by all of this. When we lose hope it's devastating. I try every day, to just get up and find the goodness in things, even though it's a battle for me too. The last two years have been awful, and I keep hoping, through those sunny daffodils you post, that I'm in this open field of hope and opportunities. I see them in all your pictures, and that my friend, gives me hope. Best, Karla